Status Meeting

Just a heads up:  Friday's post will be from the main storyline.  I don't have anything else ready to go for this week. 

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Tuesday I felt a little better, though still not 100%.  I was thankful to have this entire week off before starting my new job so I could take it easy.  Brody called me at lunch to check on me.  His concern was sweet, but I declined his offer to stop by after work.  I hadn't showered since our joint shower at his house Sunday and had no plans to shower today either.  Standing was still touch and go, and I had no desire to pass out in the tub.

By Wednesday I was feeling much better, and managed a shower and throwing together my own lunch. However, I passed on the New Year's Eve party that Kendra and Christian were throwing.  Brody offered to stay in with me, but I felt bad and insisted that he should go.  He dropped by after work and brought me takeout Thai and hung out for a little while before heading over to Kendra and Christian's house.  I didn't even make it to midnight.

It had been so long since I had been able to properly hang out with Lauren, Kinsley, and Cassie, so on Thursday we decided to blow off happy hour and have our own ladies-only happy hour.  I was finally feeling well enough to leave the house and I was dying to know how things were going Damien, if Lauren and Alex were hooking up, and how Cassie was liking working for Brody's company.

We went to our favorite Mexican place and were soon settled with chips, salsa, queso, and margaritas.  Kinsley updated me first, telling me that things went really well when she met Damien's parents.  She said that they were really normal and nice and they had seemed to like her, and she and Damien were spending a couple nights a week together.

"So is it weird?  Seeing the same guy every week?" I teased her.  She broke off a piece of chip and threw it at me, making a face.

"It is weird, actually," she admitted.  "But good weird.  I really like him.  He's so different than anyone I've ever dated--"

"That's a good thing!" Lauren broke in.  "The other guys you've dated recently totally suck, Kins." 

"I know," she replied sincerely.  "Damien doesn't suck.  It's really nice.  I've even stopped wondering when he's going to fuck it all up!  Dating older men is where it's at."  We all laughed at that.

"Speaking of dating older men," Cassie said slyly, "Ben's brother asked me out."  Cassie had met Ben through a mutual friend about a month ago, and had been interested in him.  She explained that in addition to not being interested in her, he actually ended up being seriously boring.  However, she had met his brother, who was not even close to boring, and they were going out this weekend.

"And how's work?" I asked tentatively.  I was still nervous about it not working out, since I had gotten the ball rolling on the whole thing.

"I love it!" she gushed.  "Seriously, working at Brody's company is awesome.  There are some really good perks, and there is a lot of eye candy in and out every day.  The hours are a little long some days, but the pay is worth it."  I breathed a sigh of relief.

"Good!" I said.  "But if you change your tune in a couple months, I refuse to take responsibility!"

"That's fine," she retorted.  "I'll just hate your boyfriend instead!"

I turned to Lauren.  "So, Laur, how about you?  How's the work boyfriend?"  That's what we had taken to calling her coworker that she was hooking up with.  Her cheeks turned pink.

"Um, well, we're not really seeing each other anymore," she said casually.  "You know how it goes."

"No, actually I don't," Kinsley said.  "Tell us how it goes."

"It just....didn't work," Lauren replied, her face now bright red.

"Lauren?" I asked.  "What's going on?"

"I'm seeing someone else," she said quickly, not meeting our eyes.

"Alex?!" Kinsley and I asked, simultaneously.

She stared at us.  "How did you know?" she asked, after a long, pregnant pause.

"That is the best news ever!" Kinsley exclaimed.  I agreed.  Lauren was giving us a funny look.

"I thought you guys would think it was weird," she said slowly.

I shook my head emphatically.  "No way!  It's awesome.  Tell us everything!"  So Lauren explained that they had both had a little too much to drink at Kendra's wedding and had ended up hooking up.  Neither of them acknowledged it much after that, until a few weeks later when Lauren had driven him home one night, and ended up spending the night with him.  They had been hooking up regularly for several weeks now.

"But, there's just one small problem," Lauren said, sighing unhappily.

"...Go on," Cassie prodded her, when she didn't continue.

Lauren grimaced, then spit her words out like they tasted sour.  "I think I like him.  Like, actually like him.  Maybe even want to date him."

"And this is a problem because he doesn't feel the same?" Kinsley guessed.

"No, because he does feel the same!" Lauren moaned miserably.  We all exchanged puzzled looks.

"Laur?" I said gently.  "Why is that a problem?"

"I don't know how to date," she said with exasperation.  "I don't know anything about it.  How to act, how to talk, how to enjoy someone's attention as something other than foreplay.  Dating is terrifying!"

It was true.  In all the years I'd known Lauren, she had never, ever had a boyfriend.  After she had come back from her summer in Denver with her sister, before our senior year of high school, she had lived to taunt the boys that hadn't paid attention to her when her claim to fame was being smart.   In college, she had enjoyed the attention, but used it solely to get her physical needs met.  I always thought she still never quite believed that anyone would want to spend extended periods of time in her company without ulterior motives.  She had always seemed more comfortable just hooking up with guys.

"But Lauren, Alex already knows you.  You guys get to skip all the uncomfortable, awkward getting-to-know-you stuff and jump right to the good stuff," I pointed out.  "You don't have to worry about making a bad first impression--"

"Like by getting drunk and talking about work!" Cassie crowed.  I shot her a look, and continued.

"...or not having anything in common.  You guys already know those things about each other."

"It's true," Kinsley said.  "You'll just act and talk the way you normally would around him."

"It didn't look like you guys were having any trouble when we all met for dinner the other night," I added.

"So you guys really think I should go for it?" she asked hesitantly. 

"Yes!" we all chorused.

"Okay, okay!" she said, laughing.  She threw her hands up.  "I guess I have nothing to lose."  I beamed at her and Kinsley and I high-fived across the table.  "Okay, now you guys are being stupid," she scoffed.

I threw my arms around her, hugging her awkwardly.  "I'll even help you with your makeup for your first date," I said.  "Lord knows I owe you!"

"You guys better be right about this," she said.  "Or I'll hate you all."

Going Home

The next morning my dad took us to the rehab facility to see Lynn briefly before our flight.  She didn't know we were coming back, and was excited to see us.  Brody popped in with me to say hi, then excused himself to wait in the waiting room with my dad so that Lynn and I could have some time together.  We were only able to stay for about 20 minutes, but it was a good visit.

When we got to the airport, we got through security quickly and sat at the gate for about 15 minutes before finding out our flight was delayed.  I was already sad about leaving and knowing that I wouldn't be able to see Lynn for awhile, because she certainly wouldn't be coming out to Colorado anytime soon.  The news about the flight made me positively stony.  Then, while we were sitting there, Brody got a work call.  He was on the phone for over a half hour, then looked irritated when he came back.

"What's up?" I asked him curiously.

"Gotta go back to Dallas again," he said, the frustration in his voice evident.

"Your person in Dallas is quite the troublemaker," I replied, rolling my eyes.  "Are you just going to see if you can change your ticket and fly from here?"

"I hadn't even considered that," he said, thinking about it for a second.  "But no, I don't think so.  I'll fly back with you and go out tomorrow.  That way I can take Pete with me."  I nodded.  Knowing there was an end in sight definitely helped my feelings about the last minute trips, and Brody had only taken a couple short phone calls while we were here.  He had turned his phone off completely on Christmas day, and I knew it was for my benefit.  I appreciated it so much, and made sure to tell him so.  I wanted him to know that I noticed the changes he was making and appreciated them.

I got up to walk around the terminal for a little while to fend off my threatening restlessness.  When I came back and sat down, Brody said, "You know, any time you want to go home, I can take care of it."

"Thank you," I said shortly.  I appreciated his offer, but I'd be lying if I said that part of me didn't resent that Brody had had to pay for our tickets so I could go home for Christmas.

"I mean it," he said firmly.  "Stop being so stubborn about it.  I appreciate your desire to be independent, but I don't ever want you to feel like you can't go home when you want to.  Especially with everything that's happened with Lynn."  

My cheeks colored.  "I know, thank you," I said contritely, immediately feeling guilty for my resentment.  "I really do appreciate it."

"I know you do," he said gently.  "I wasn't trying to suggest otherwise."

We finally got on our plane an hour later.  The flight was awful, with a ton of turbulence and screaming children.  I had never been so happy to see the inside of an airport when we finally got off the plane at DIA.

"I need to go home to get stuff for Dallas," Brody said as we walked to his car.  "Do you want me to drop you off at home, or do you want to come spend the night at my place?"  As he asked, his hand, which had been resting on my lower back, slid a little lower, reminding me that we had spent the last three nights together without having sex.  (He might have been gung-ho about having sex at his mom's house, but it was not happening at my parents' house!)

"If you're up for company, I'd definitely like to spend the night," I replied.

He grinned.  "I was hoping you'd say that."

We were barely in the door when he pushed my suitcase to the side and slid his hands around my waist.  "Whoa, I really need a shower first," I said.  "Traveling makes me feel so gross."

He groaned, then he smirked.  "Well then, do you want some help?" 

"That sounds....helpful!" I replied with a laugh.

"So, that's a yes, right?" he asked hopefully.  I just grinned and walked in the direction of his bathroom, losing clothes along the way.

Much to Brody's disappointment, I did insist on actually getting clean in the shower.  He did his best to distract me from my mission, and he almost prevented me from completing it.  He barely even gave me time to dry off after before he picked me up and carried me into the bedroom.  He set me down carefully on the bed and kissed my neck.  "Now, if it's alright with you, I'd like to be done waiting," he said in my ear, his voice low and husky.

I wrapped my legs around his back and pulled him close to me.  "I think I'm okay with that."  He thrust into me in one hard stroke, and then pinned my arms against the bed.  Maybe I should keep him waiting more often.  That thought, along with the rest of them, quickly left my head as we had some of the best sex we'd ever had.  Definitely need to keep him waiting more often.

Afterwards, I shivered a little as I curled up next to him.  "What happened to the blankets?" I asked sleepily.

"Cold, after that?" he asked in surprise.

"Yeah, I've been freezing pretty much all day, I have no idea what my problem is.  And now I'm sweaty and cold.  So much for that shower."  He sat up and found a blanket and pulled it up over us.

I laid there, trying to ignore the headache that was building at my temples.  When I couldn't anymore, I sighed and wiggled out of Brody's grasp.  "Hey, do you have any Tylenol or something?  I have a headache."

"I think you're supposed to complain about the headache before we have sex.  That's what I hear women do, anyways," he said with a laugh.  He stood.  "I think I have some downstairs, I'll go grab you some."

He returned a few minutes later with a bottle of aspirin and a glass of water.  I swallowed the aspirin and laid back down, and I was out within a few minutes.

Brody's phone rang loudly early the next morning.  I rolled over to look at the time, and was surprised to see it was just a few minutes before we needed to get up so he could drop me off and make it to the airport.  He grabbed it and walked out into the hall, answering on the way.  While he was talking, I worked on getting out of bed.  My head was still pounding, and by the time I worked my way up into a seated position, I was a little dizzy too.

I was still sitting on the edge of the bed, trying to get it together, when Brody came back in.  "Good news," he said, smiling.  "I don't have to go to Dallas.  I don't even have to go into the office.  If you want to go back to sleep, I'm going to go do a little work downstairs for a couple hours.  We can grab brunch later if you want."  I nodded and climbed back under the blankets.  I grabbed the aspirin bottle and swallowed two more before pulling the blankets back over me and going back to sleep.

I was woken up a few hours later by Brody climbing back into bed.  He slid up against my back and wrapped an arm around me.  I groaned and rolled onto my stomach when he kissed the back of my neck.  I felt awful.  He laid his hand against the back of my damp neck.  "You okay?" he asked.   I shook my head, and immediately regretted it.  He gently rolled me over and I shut my eyes against the daylight.  "Liv, you look awful," he said, gently loosening the strands of hair that were stuck to my forehead and smoothing them back.

"I feel awful," I confirmed.

"Go back to sleep," he said.  "I can take you home in the morning before I go to work."

"I don't want you to get sick," I protested weakly.  The thought of getting myself out of this bed and sitting in the car for 20 minutes was far from appealing, and Brody's bed was really, amazingly comfortable.

He shook his head.  "Don't be ridiculous, you're not going anywhere, unless you think you'll be more comfortable at home."

"Not really."

"Then you'll stay.  Do you need anything?"  I shook my head.  "Well, I'll bring you up a bottle of water.  I'll be downstairs in my office getting some work done.  I have my phone, you can call if you need something."

"Mine's in my purse, I think," I mumbled.  I heard him rustling around and then he set my phone down on the nightstand next to me.

"Sleep," he said, kissing me on the forehead.  No problem, I was asleep again before he even got back up with the promised bottle of water.

When I woke again, Brody was sitting on the bed next to me.  "What time is it?" I croaked.

"After 2 pm," he replied.  "Are you hungry?"  I shook my head.  "You should eat something.  Soup?  Cereal?  Grilled cheese?"  Always a sucker for grilled cheese, I told him that maybe I could manage to eat one. 

He disappeared downstairs, and returned about 15 minutes later with one perfect grilled cheese sandwich and a bowl of tomato soup.  "It's my mom's homemade tomato basil, it's amazing."  I tried a spoonful and quickly agreed.

"That is really good," I said, eating another spoonful.

"I have a ton in the freezer, so just let me know if you want some more," he said.  He sat with me while I ate, and when I finished, he asked if I felt like coming downstairs for awhile.  I declined.  Eating had worn me out and I was getting dizzy again just sitting up.

"Thank you," I said, as he gathered my dishes.  "I'm going to feel awful if you get sick too."

"Don't worry about me," he dismissed my concern.

I slept off and on for the rest of the day.  Brody slept in his guest room since I had no desire to be touched and he was incapable of sleeping with me without touching me.  He woke me up in the morning and asked if I wanted to go home or stay.  I decided to go home, since I had probably shared enough of my germs with him already.  I hauled myself out of bed and made it down to Brody's car, where I slept pretty much the entire drive to my house.  Brody hauled all my stuff in and after judging the contents of my fridge, informed me he'd bring me lunch.  And dinner.  I protested but he wasn't hearing it.

He dropped off lunch around noon, and arrived after work with groceries.  "You look a little better," he commented, as he made  me some dinner.  I was upright on the couch, at least, which I supposed was an improvement.  

"Thanks," I said when he handed me a plate of food.  I managed to eat about half of it.

"If there was any doubt about you being sick, it's been confirmed," he said, laughing.  "Too sick to eat."  He put the plate in the fridge and washed the dishes.  "You'll be okay if I head home?" he asked.

"Brody, I have the flu or something, I'm not dying.  Thank you for the groceries and dinner."  He kissed me on the forehead and left, and I hauled myself up to bed.

Lynn's Christmas Gift

Thanks for understanding my one less post for the week.  I feel some bonuses coming up, so I'm posting this one a little early :)  I hope everyone had a good holiday!
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I woke up early the next morning, nervous and excited about going to see Lynn.  I had talked to her several times since the accident, but I couldn't help but remember the horrible feeling of seeing her battered body in the hospital bed.  I wondered if she'd look and act more like her old self today.  Selfish as it was, I wasn't sure if I could handle seeing her broken again. 

I tried to slip out of bed carefully so I wouldn't wake Brody up, but I heard him shift as I got my first foot on the ground.  "For being so small, you sure do make a lot of noise," he said sleepily.  "Where are you going?  It's early."

"Can't sleep," I said back quietly.  He held a hand out to me, and I slid back into bed.  He pulled me close and I nestled against his chest.

"Nervous about seeing Lynn?" he asked.  I nodded, once again impressed at his ability to know what I was thinking.  He didn't say anything else, but his fingers found the back of my neck and massaged my tense muscles gently.  I yawned; my eyelids were still heavy with sleep.  I relaxed against Brody, focusing on his fingers working against my neck, and eventually drifted back into sleep.

When I woke again, I was alone in the bed.  I was baffled that Brody had managed to get up without waking me.  I looked at the clock and was surprised to see it was nearly 10, over 3 hours after I had initially woken up.  Apparently I needed the sleep.

I stumbled towards the sound of voices and found Brody and my dad sitting at the kitchen table.  "Uh oh, it's alive!" my dad said, regarding my disheveled appearance with a smirk.

"Shhhh," Brody said back, returning my dad's smirk.  "I've heard it's particularly aggressive and hostile in the mornings."  My dad cracked up and I rolled my eyes and walked to the fridge.  They quickly returned to their conversation, arguing about who they thought would be in the Superbowl.

"Where's mom?" I asked, sitting down with an orange and a glass of apple juice.

"Good morning, dear daughter.  I'm delighted to see you as well!" my dad said back with a smile.  "Your mother went for a walk.  She thought you might like to go with her, but she got tired of waiting about an hour ago and left.  You know how she is."  I nodded, carefully picking all the gross white stuff off the outside of my orange.  "What time are you going to see Lynn?"

"1 o'clock," I said back, swallowing my first section of orange.  "Hey, this orange is really good."  Brody and my dad both looked at me strangely.  I frowned.  "What?"

"Nothing, honey," my dad.  "Leftovers for lunch okay?" I nodded.

Soon it was time to get ready to go see Lynn.  I was now more excited than nervous.  I called Kathy to see if there were any limitations on what I could bring into the facility for Lynn, and she said no.  I grabbed her Christmas present and the keys to my mom's SUV, and we left around 12:30.  I stopped at our favorite little coffee shop and got two chai lattes and coffee for Brody, and we drove to the rehab facility.  Brody was coming along for moral support, but planned to wait in the waiting area.  He assured me he'd be fine there as I fussed about letting him take the car and find something else to do.  He promised he'd let me know if he changed his mind.

Finally, I couldn't put off going inside any longer.  I told the receptionist who we were, and she smiled a friendly smile at me.  "Lynn is so excited," she said warmly.  She showed Brody to a small, comfortably furnished waiting room and took me down a hallway.  I was surprised to see Lynn standing next to her bed with a walker.  Aside from a cast from foot to thigh on one leg, the walker, and a still healing scar across her forehead, she looked so much more like her pre-accident self.  She squealed when she saw me, and almost lost her balance.  She sat down quickly on the bed, wincing.

"Can I hug you without hurting you?" I asked tentatively.   She nodded and reached for me.  I hugged her carefully, and was shocked at the force with which she hugged me back.  I picked up the paper cup from where I had set it on the table and handed it to her.

"You didn't!" she exclaimed.  "Oh, I haven't had this amazing chai in ages."

"I brought you a Christmas gift too," I said, handing it to her excitedly.  She had been complaining about the shoes she was allowed to wear.  Apparently, she would be stuck in properly supportive shoes for several months after the accident while she worked on getting her badly damaged leg working properly again.  I had scoured the internet until I found shoes that fit the criteria but were still reasonably cute and Lynn's style.  I'd sent the link to Kathy, who had double checked with the doctor overseeing Lynn's rehab, who had approved them.

She tore the paper off, and opened the box.  "Are these Dr. Heidelberg approved?" she asked in amazement, turning one of the shoes this way and that.

"They are," I said with a smile.

"You know me so well," she said, grinning broadly.  "I don't love them, because there's no such thing as a supportive shoe that I love, but these are the least ugly Dr. Heidelberg approved shoes I've ever seen!"  I laughed.  "Thank you, Liv.  You are seriously the best."

We chatted for a bit and she filled me in on her rehab.  She was standing with the walker for short intervals, but she still couldn't walk, and her body was too weak from the accident to use crutches at the moment.  She was still having a hard time with her memory, but she said that they were impressed with her speech and motor function otherwise.  I was so happy to see her feeling better and in good spirits.

"Hey!" she said suddenly, looking at me.  "Did Brody come home with you?"

"Yeah, he's waiting for me," I replied.

"Wait, he's here?!" she squeaked.  I nodded.  "And you were going to keep this from me?  I demand that you bring him back here immediately!"  I couldn't help but laugh at her enthusiasm.

"Okay, okay, give me a minute to go get him," I said.  I walked out to the waiting area.

"Done already?" Brody asked in surprise.

"No, Lynn wants to meet you.  Is that okay?"  I asked, a little nervous suddenly.

He smiled.  "Of course, I'm dying to meet her.  If she's up for it, let's go."  I led him back to Lynn's room, almost getting lost on the way.  She had laid back on the bed while we were gone, and I could tell the visit was draining her.

She sat up when we came back in though.  I introduced them, and Lynn promptly turned to me and said, "He is easily the hottest guy you've ever dated."  I blushed bright red, and so did Brody.  She laughed.  "Sorry," she said, turning to Brody.  "My social skills are even worse than Liv's."

"It's true," I agreed.  "She did that purposely to make you uncomfortable."

We settled into easy conversation and talked until Lynn looked seriously worn out.  "Lynnie, we should go so you can rest," I said softly. 

"No..." she protested weakly.

"Yes," said a firm but gentle voice from the door.  "They're right, that's quite enough excitement for one day."  We all turned, and a young nurse standing near the door greeted us cheerfully.  "She thinks she's capable of a lot more than she really is.  Most of the time, it's good because she's very motivated, but she definitely needs people to keep her in check."

"Sounds like my Lynn!" I said, chuckling.

"You must be Liv, then?" the nurse asked.  "I'm Casey.  Lynn's been talking about your visit for days."

"Have not," she argued softly, her eyes closed. 

I ignored Lynn and introduced myself to Casey.  Casey firmly repeated to Lynn that it was time to rest and offered to walk us out.  We said goodbye to Lynn, and she made me promise to call.  On the way out, I asked Casey if we could stop by for just a short visit again the next day before our flight.  She confirmed that that would be okay, and thanked us for making Lynn's day.

When we got back into the parking lot, I exhaled a breath that I felt like I had been holding all day.  Wordlessly, Brody held his hand out for the keys and got in the driver's side.  "You okay?" he asked, after adjusting the seat and mirrors.

I grinned.  "I'm great.  It was so good to see her acting so normal.  I'm just a little overwhelmed."

Later that evening, we had dinner and drinks with a bunch of my friends from the area.  Amy jumped up from her seat when we walked in and hugged me.  I introduced Brody to the people there he hadn't met when we were here after Lynn's accident.  We enjoyed our dinner while they caught me up on gossip from home and I told them about living in Colorado.  Amy mentioned coming out to visit in the summer, which I really hoped she was serious about.  We were home by midnight so we could get up and stop by to see Lynn before our flight.

(Now) Kinsley: Classy Fucking Establishment

Now that Damien and I had had sex once, we couldn't stop.  This was far more my style and much more comfortable to me.  But surprisingly, I was getting better at the other stuff--the talking, the feelings, the cuddling (after sex and just for the hell of it).  I was starting to feel really comfortable with him in a way I'd never felt before.

I thought that this would scare the shit out of me, but it didn't.  In fact, I kind of liked it.  It's what inspired me to call him at lunch time on a Friday to ask him to come over after work that night.  I purposely didn't have any plans, aiming to have a relaxing night at home by myself.  But I realized I'd rather with be Damien, so I called him to ask him over for our fourteenth date (yes, still counting).

"Hey you," he answered.  "Is everything okay?"  I never called him during the work day, so I could see why he was concerned.  And I loved that he was concerned.

"Everything is fine," I assured him.  "But everything will be even better if you can come over tonight."

"What happened to your night to yourself?" he teased.  "Realized you might have other needs?"

I laughed.  "No, I just want to see you.  I do want you for more than your body, you know.  Though I do greatly appreciate your body too..."  I trailed off, not wanting to get too inappropriate in the middle of the work day.

"I'd love to see you tonight," he said.  "I'm trying to finish up some stuff on that case that came in earlier this week so I don't have to come in tomorrow, so I'm not sure when I'll be done.  Can I call you?"

"Please," I replied.  "I'll see you tonight."  We said goodbye and I hung up, giddy at the prospect of seeing him tonight.

I barely made it through the rest of the day, distracted by seeing Damien tonight.  What was wrong with me?  I stopped at the grocery store on the way home and picked some stuff up for a simple pasta with veggies and chicken.  I was no master chef, so I tended to stick to easy things that I knew how to make.

I had just gotten out of the shower after exfoliating, shaving, and washing my hair when my phone rang around 6:30.  I put it on speaker so I could get dressed.  "Hey," Damien said.  "I have about an hour or so left here, I think.  I'll see you around 8?  Unless, of course, you've changed your mind and want to stick with your night by yourself."

"No way, you're not getting out of it that easy!" I quipped.  "I'll see you around 8."

"I'm looking forward to it," he said, and I could hear his smile.

I hung up, put on a lightly scented lotion, finished getting dressed, and dried my hair.  I wished Liv was here with her makeup skills.  I tried my best for a perfectly natural-but-just-a-little-bit-better look, and didn't do too bad.

At about 7:20 I started cooking, and finished just a few minutes before Damien knocked on my door.  He hugged me tightly, then pulled away and looked at me.  "You look amazing, as always," he greeted me.  "And something smells good."

"That would be dinner," I replied with a smile.  "Unless you're not hungry."

"I'm starving," he said, pulling his shoes off and kissing me.  We sat down to eat, and after a few bites he said, "This is really good.  I had no idea you cooked."

"Just a little.  I have a few things I do really well, and then a bunch things I do okay with.  Just simple stuff, nothing fancy."

"I can't believe we've been dating for almost two months and I didn't know that you could cook," he said.  He considered for a moment, then said, "Actually, never mind, I do believe that."  He smiled to show me he was teasing.

I smirked.  "It's like a never ending treasure hunt.  What will you find out about Kinsley next?"

"So many things to say about your treasure hunt comment," he remarked, cocking an eyebrow.  "None of them are appropriate for the dinner table."

"Then I guess you'd better keep them to yourself, because this is a classy fucking establishment," I said haughtily.

"Of course it is," he replied, laughing.  "I'd expect nothing less."

When we finished, he picked up our plates over my protests and took them to the sink.  I followed him there and slipped my arms around his waist, leaning my face against his back, between his shoulder blades.   "Did you get everything done you needed to at work?" I asked.

He pulled my hands off of him so he could turn and repositioned us so my head was against his shoulder and he could wrap his arms around me.  "I did, thankfully.  I'm glad we got that one taken care of quickly.  Now I can focus on you for the rest of the night."

"I like the sound of that," I replied, relaxing against him as his hand ran up and down my back. 

As much as I wanted to have sex, I think we were both worn out from a long week.  We ended up laying together on my couch, talking about random things with the TV on softly in the background.  Eventually Damien shifted me so he could sit up and stretch.  "I'd better get going before I fall asleep," he said.

I didn't want him to leave.  I hadn't been planning on asking him to stay, and I surprised myself by wanting him to.  "You could stay," I mumbled softly.

"I didn't hear you, what did you say?" he asked as he stood.  I looked up at him to see if he was fucking with me, but he was simply waiting for my repeat myself.

"I said," I repeated a little louder, "you could stay.  Here.  If you wanted."

He looked surprised, but not in a bad way.  He sat back down next to me and said, "I would love to stay, but is that what you want?"

"Yes," I whispered.  I found my voice and said louder, "Yes, I want you to stay."

This was quickly becoming overly dramatic and uncomfortable and I was so thankful when Damien grinned and said, "I'd be honored to spend the night in this classy fucking establishment."

"Good, I'll grab you a pillow and blanket and you can make yourself comfortable on the couch," I replied.  I tried to keep a straight face but I couldn't, and Damien shook his head.

"Don't toy with me, young lady," he said, but he was laughing too.  "I wasn't planning on staying, so I don't have anything with me..."

"I have an extra toothbrush you can use," I said.  "It's new," I added quickly, which made him laugh.  "Fuck you!" I yelped.  "I just wanted to be clear."

"You're clear as crystal, sweetheart," he said, still grinning evilly at me.  I grabbed a throw pillow from the couch and whipped it at him.  He caught it easily, then wrapped an arm around my waist and threw me easily over his shoulder.  I yelped and demanded that he put me down, though I'm not sure I was terribly convincing, choking it out over my hysterical laughter.  He walked upstairs with me, as easily as if it was a scarf he'd just flung over his shoulder and not my body.

He shouldered open the mostly closed door to my room and dumped me unceremoniously on the bed.  I managed to grab onto his arms as I fell and I yanked hard.  I had just enough momentum to cause him to topple onto the bed on top of me.  I quickly scooted out from under him and got on top of him, straddling him.

"Still tired?" I asked, smirking down at him.

He ran his hands up my legs, gripped my hips, and flipped us both over easily.  "Not even close," he declared.  "Are you?"  I shook my head and he leaned down and kissed me.  "You are something else," he murmured as he moved his lips to my neck.

"A good something else or--" my gasp interrupted my own sentence as his hand slid underneath my bra and lightly pinched my nipple.  I groaned and finished, "or a bad something else?"

He pulled his mouth away from my body to answer, and I sat up and yanked my shirt up over my head and unhooked my bra.  "The best something else," he replied, looking at me seriously.

The intensity of his gaze was too much at this moment so I said lightly, "You're just saying that because you're trying to get into my pants."  I leaned up to kiss him but he pressed his fingers to my lips and stopped me.

"I'm not," he insisted, cupping my face in his hand.  "You are the best thing that's happened to me in a really long time."  I tried again to kiss him, because I was really uncomfortable now, and he must have recognized my discomfort because he kissed me back this time, hard.  I had no idea how I could possibly be the best thing that's happened to him in a long time, but I believed that he thought that.  He made it obvious. 

He sensed my distraction and pulled away again.  "What's wrong?" he asked.

"Nothing," I said with a smile.  "Just thinking about how I'm the best thing that's happened to you in a really long time."  He smiled back, then kissed me hungrily, and there were no more distractions.

I curled up against his chest after, like I always did.  After several minutes, Damien kissed the top of my head and asked, "Do you still want me to stay?"

"I do," I replied.

His arm around my back tightened slightly.  "Does this classy fucking establishment require sleepwear?"

I laughed.  "Um, I guess I'm not sure," I said.

"Well maybe it should, at least for tonight," he suggested.  "If you're worried about being uncomfortable with someone sleeping in your bed for the first time, pajamas might make a difference."  I hadn't even considered this, and the fact that he was worried about doing this in the most comfortable way possible for me was incredibly sweet and mind-blowing, compared to the reaction I usually got.

"Yeah, good point," I agreed.  I stood up and pulled on a tank top and pair of shorts while Damien tugged his boxers back on.  He held up his shirt in question and I shook my head.  "Not unless you want to, I like you better without it anyway."  He chuckled and tossed it back on the floor before heading into the bathroom.  When he came out, I went in.  I brushed my teeth, washed my face, and gave myself a pep talk about not being ridiculous about a man sleeping in my bed.

When I came out of the bathroom, Damien was sitting on the edge of the bed.  "Do you have a side?" he asked.

"I usually just sleep in the middle...but I think I prefer the right side?" He climbed into bed on the left side, closer to the door. 

"Good, I like the left.  That works out well," he said, smiling.  I was surprised at how this was going.  The fact that I wouldn't spend the night with a guy was something I had been subjected to taunting over from anyone I had had sex with more than once.  People find the stupidest things to mock you for.

I switched the light off and scooted towards Damien, shifting so my back was to him.  After a brief (probably surprised and confused) pause, he pressed his chest against my back and wrapped an arm around me.  I settled back against him, and now that I was comfortable with him here, in my bed, I could understand why people liked this.

In the dark, it was easier to say feelings out loud.  "Damien?" I asked softly.

"Hmm?" he responded, nuzzling his face against my neck.

"Thank you," I said.

"For?"

"For being understanding about my weird sleeping thing.  And not pushing it.  And being really considerate of it tonight and thinking through some of the details for me.  I...well, it means a lot."  My face got warm as I talked.

"You're welcome, though I feel weird saying that, because I feel weird about you thanking me.  That's what people in relationships do," he said.

"Are we in a relationship?" I asked curiously.

"I consider us in a relationship," he confirmed.  "Do you not?"

"I hadn't really thought about it," I admitted.  "I guess so.  I mean, I do.  It's not like I'm seeing anyone else, or want to, or anything.  I'm sorry, I'm a little thrown off by the circumstances under which we're having this conversation."

His fingers stroked the inside of my forearm, sending a shiver up my spine.  "Don't apologize, I get it.  So if we make it through the night, do I get to call you my girlfriend?" 

"Sure," I replied, smiling in the dark.  "But only if we make it through the night."

Christmas

Hi readers!  Just like with Thanksgiving, because of my love of bonus posts, we're a little ahead of schedule for Christmas too.  Because of the holiday, I'll probably only be posting twice this week--this post, and the third and final post of Kinsley's current series.  I'm not entirely sure when I'm posting that one, but it will most likely be late Tuesday or early Wednesday. 
 
Also, you might have noticed I'm a little less involved in the comments lately.  I do apologize for that--I really like responding to comments as much as possible.  It's been really crazy at work and with the end of my semester.  I also just got a promotion and everything is moving really quickly so I'm a little stressed and overwhelmed with that.  I'll continue to post regularly and on schedule (except for the one less post this week), so don't worry about that, but you just might not see me around in the comments and such as much.  I'll try to respond when I can though, because I appreciate all the comments so much! 

As always, thanks for reading and commenting!  I hope that everyone has safe and happy holidays, no matter what you celebrate!  
____________________________________

We flew out the next morning, and the roads and airport were packed with Christmas Eve travelers.  I was tired and in no mood to deal with the crowds, but I tried to keep my tongue in check so I didn't act ungrateful.

I rolled my eyes when the lady in front me in the security line didn't have her I.D. out to give to the TSA agent, and sighed when she approached the scanner with shoes and coat on, and her laptop still in her bag.  She made no move to get out of the way to get her act together so the people behind her that were prepared could go through, and I fidgeted impatiently while I waited.  When I got through, I saw her standing directly in the way of the end of the conveyor belt, struggling to get her shoes and coat back on.  I squeezed my eyes shut and clenched my fists before moving out of the way of the person behind me.  When I could finally get through to the belt, I grabbed my bins and yanked them over to the side, away from everyone else to get my stuff back in order.

Brody watched me with a half smile.  "Fresh out of Christmas spirit today?" he asked as he straightened from pulling his shoe back on.

"Sorry," I said ruefully.  "I hate this part of traveling."  He grabbed my coat and my carry-on and nodded.

"Me too.  Maybe someday I'll have a corporate jet that we can take instead."  Judging by the look in his eyes, I guessed he was only half joking, if that.

"That sounds excellent.  You get to work on that," I joked, standing up.  I reached for my stuff but he shook his head.

"I've got it, let's go."  We made our way to our gate and sat.  We had about 15 minutes before boarding.  "Now, tell me about this grandma of yours," he said, once we were settled.

"I don't even know where to start," I replied.  "Maybe with the time she refused to attend my college graduation because the speaker was the liberal governor at the time?  Or the time that she refused to attend my cousin's wedding because they weren't getting married in a church?"  Brody raised his eyebrows.

"Religion is very important to her, which is great, except she's one of those small percentage of religious people that makes non-religious people dislike religion.  I just said religion a lot."  Brody laughed.  "I love her, obviously, and we are very thankful for her church because they've helped her so much, between being a great community for her, helping her with her garden, checking in on her, etc, but she takes it a bit far sometimes.  Me and my parents aren't really religious at all, so she's usually got something to say about that.  I don't mind, because I'm really glad she's so happy and involved with her church and her beliefs, but it makes my mom kind of crazy sometimes."

"So she's Chris's mom?" Brody clarified.  I nodded.  "Got it.  So, is she going to ask me about church?"

"Probably."

"And what should I say?" Brody also didn't attend church or hold to any particular beliefs.

I considered this.  "Your best bet is to be honest, I think, and I'll try to save you."

"That is...reassuring," he said, looking nervous. 

"It'll be fine, just stay away from talking politics with her at all costs," I instructed.  "And really, compared to your dad, she's like a tame old housecat."

"I hate cats," he joked.

They began boarding for our flight, and since Brody had gotten first class tickets, we got to board right away.  I settled into the roomy (by airplane standards, anyway) seat and stretched my legs out in front of me.  "I could get used to this," I said.

When the flight attendant came around offering free drinks, I was sold.  "I will never fly coach again," I declared, sipping my mimosa. Now that we were through the annoying party, my mood was much better.

Brody laughed.  "That's what happened to me," he said.  The plane started to taxi and I didn't respond.  I didn't mind flying at all, but takeoff always sort of terrified me.  Brody took my hand and rubbed his thumb across my knuckles while I squeezed my eyes shut and tried to pretend that this giant, loaded hunk of metal actually weighed about 10 pounds and would effortlessly defy the laws of gravity.

He turned to me once we were in the air.  "Okay, run the itinerary by me one more time," he said.

"Sure.  Today my mom will feed us her famous lasagna and we'll go to our traditional Christmas Eve movie and then drive around to see all the lights.  Tomorrow morning we'll open presents, then my mom will boss us all around while she cleans and dad cooks.  Grandma, my cousin, my aunt, and two uncles will come over around 4.  They'll probably be gone by 8."  I looked over at him.  He was nodding intently, but I knew he'd probably ask me at least twice more what the plan was.  "Friday I wanted to go see Lynn during the day, and then a bunch of my college friends are getting together Friday night.  My parents want to have brunch before we leave on Saturday."

"Okay.  Got it this time.  I think."  I looked at him skeptically.  "Yeah, yeah," he said, laughing.  "Can you just tell me every morning what we're doing?"

I dozed with my head against Brody's shoulder for most of the flight.  I woke up fully when they announced the final approach.  Landing didn't freak me out nearly as much as taking off did, but it was my second least favorite part of the flight.  When we were safely on the ground, I pulled out my phone and texted my dad that we had landed.  He texted back right away that he had parked the car and would meet us at baggage claim.  Totally unnecessary, but that's my dad.

We made our way off the plane and down to baggage claim.  I saw my dad right away and threw my arms around him.  "Welcome back, sweetie," he said, hugging me hard.  He turned to Brody and stuck out his hand.  "Good to see you again, and under better circumstances," he said, shaking Brody's hand.  He paused and then said, quietly.  "And thank you for making it possible for our daughter to spend Christmas with us.  We offered to pay for her ticket, but she got mad at us for it."

"I can hear you," I said loudly.

"That's great news!" Dad said.  "That means your hearing isn't going yet."  I rolled my eyes as he and Brody laughed.  They were too busy appreciating their own hilarity that no one even noticed I had my bag until I was standing there with it next to me.  I only checked a bag because I was bringing gifts and couldn't fit everything in my carry-on, so Brody didn't need to wait for anything.

"Are you guys ready?" I huffed.  This was going to be a long weekend if Brody and my dad were going to spend it enjoying jokes at my expense.  But I was glad they seemed to get along, at least.

Brody grinned at me and took my suitcase from my hand.  "Careful," he warned my dad.  "She's cranky today."  I glared at him but had to smile when he leaned down and kissed my forehead softly.

My mom (and the smell of her amazing lasagna) greeted us warmly when we got to the house.  Brody hauled our bags up to my room while I grabbed us something to drink.  The rest of the day passed smoothly.  My parents and Brody got along well and my mom's lasagna was delicious.

On Christmas morning, I woke up to Brody settling an arm around me and pulling me tighter against him.  "Merry Christmas," he said softly.

"Merry Christmas," I murmured back.  The sounds of dishes clinking and footsteps told me that my parents were already up.  We got up and went out to join them.  There were a ton of gifts under the tree, and I couldn't help by feel excited like a little kid.

We spent the next hour and a half opening gifts.  My parents had even gotten a bunch of stuff for Brody, which was awesome, especially with the last minute notice.  After presents, Brody and I made some eggs and French toast while my parents started getting things ready for dinner.  After eating breakfast and cleaning up the gifts, my parents kicked us out of the kitchen. 

We sat in the living room for awhile, but then my mom came in with the vacuum and shooed us out of there too.  We offered to help but were still kicked unceremoniously out.  We decided to just get out of the house and go for a walk.

Brody jammed his hands deep into his pockets as we walked.  "This is awful," he complained.  "It's so cold.  Why is it so cold here?"  I laughed.  It was considerably colder than what we had left behind in Colorado, but not anywhere near the coldest it was sure to get, and I told him as much.  "No wonder you left," he grumbled.

I moved closer to him, sliding my arm around his back.  "You get used to it, kind of," I said.  He looked skeptical.  Needless to say, our walk didn't last long.  We showered when we got back and I sat on the floor in my bedroom to do my hair and makeup while Brody called his parents and siblings and wished them a Merry Christmas.  Brody's mom asked to talk to me, and wished me a Merry Christmas herself, which I thought was sweet.    "She likes you better than she likes me," Brody said when he hung up.

"It's understandable," I said with a smirk.  He poked me with his toe, trying to push me over.  I had just grabbed his foot when the doorbell rang.  Brody looked at me nervously.  "You'll be fine," I assured him.  "My parents love you, they will too."

It was my Aunt Sherry, Uncle Joe, and my 20 year old cousin Celeste, and I quickly introduced them to Brody.  Brody turned on the charm and soon had Sherry and Joe cracking up and it was obvious that Celeste was deep under his spell.  "He is so hot, I hate you," she whispered to me when we walked into the kitchen to get drinks. 

I grinned at her.  "It's so good to see you too, Celeste," I quipped back.  She threw her arms around me.

"I miss you, you should let me come out and visit you this summer," she said.  I told her that we could definitely talk about it.  Celeste was my only cousin, and even though we weren't very close in age, we had been good friends since we were always the only kids at family gatherings.  The doorbell rang again while we were in the kitchen, and I knew it would be my Uncle Nick and my grandma.  I hurried back into the living room to get the door.

I pulled it open and Uncle Nick hugged me.  "What a surprise!  Your dad said you weren't going to make it!" he exclaimed.

"Merry Christmas, Uncle Nick!" I said.  "We weren't going to, but we managed."

"We?" he asked.  I motioned Brody over and introduced him.

"Ah, yes, you're the young man that flew up from work to be with Olivia when her friend was injured in that accident," he said.  Brody looked surprised, and I imagined my face mirrored his. 

"Small towns, word gets around," Nick said with a wink.

"Just leave an old lady standing in the foyer with her coat and purse, why don't you?" my grandma's crisp voice rang out behind us. 

"Sorry, Grandma!" I called, slipping past Nick.  I took her coat and purse and hung them in the closet before hugging her.  "Merry Christmas!"

"Merry Christmas, dear.  It's so nice to see you," she replied, holding me at arm's length and examining me from head to foot.  She sniffed.  "Unfortunately, it seems that Colorado agrees with you.  Have you found a church out there?"

"It does, Grandma.  It's wonderful out there.  And no, not yet.  But I'd like to introduce you to my boyfriend."

She looked past me and her gaze landed on Brody.  She eyed him appraisingly.  "Hello, son," she said evenly.  Then she turned and looked at me.  "Surely you could join him at his church," she said, in her passive aggressive way.

"Yes, Grandma, I certainly could, if he attended one.  Do you want something to drink?"  She dropped it for the time being, and accepted my offer to get her a drink.  Brody came with me.

"That wasn't so bad," he said.

"Nope, not yet!" I replied.  "And Celeste thinks you're god's gift to the world," I said with a small chuckle.

"Is she wrong?" he asked, grinning at me.  I rolled my eyes but laughed.

The rest of the evening went surprisingly well.  After a couple of well-avoided politically-themed questions, my Grandma was on her best behavior.   The rest of my family seemed to love Brody, just like everyone else who ever met him.

After everyone was gone and my parents were in bed, I turned to him.  "My family loves you," I said.  "Celeste wants to marry you, and I'm pretty sure my Aunt Sherry does too.  Joe and Nick are ready to take you fishing and hunting.  And Grandma behaved herself, which is high praise in our world."

"Your family is so normal," he said, almost wistfully.  "It was easy."  He hugged me.  "Did you have a good Christmas?" he asked.

"The best I've ever had," I replied, burrowing against his chest.  "Thanks for making it happen, and for being here with me."

"I wouldn't have wanted to be anywhere else," he said, kissing me. 

(Now) Kinsley: The Seventh Date

I pulled up in front of Damien's house and fought down the mix of nerves and excitement that were bubbling up, threatening to overcome me.  I tried to reason with myself that it still might not happen today.  I had never waited this long for sex, and it definitely turned it into something really...complicated.  On one hand, it felt a lot more important and the build up was insane.  On the other, the build up was insane.  What if it sucked?  What a let down.  And then all this time and anticipation, wasted.

As I walked up the sidewalk to his house, he pulled open the door and grinned at me.  I couldn't help but smile back, and some of my nerves dissipated.   He pulled me into a tight hug.  "Hey baby," he said softly into my ear, before pulling back to kiss me.  "I'm glad you're here.  You look great."  He took the bottle of wine I offered him. 

As he opened it and poured us each a glass, we discussed what to order for dinner.  When we finally settled on something, he called and placed our order, then led me to the couch.  We sat with our wine and he asked, "Did you have a good week?"

That question out of anyone else's mouth would get an answer of, "Yeah, it was fine, how was yours?"  But he looked at me expectantly and curiously and I knew he actually cared.  "It was slow," I said.  "Which is weird, because we're getting close to the deadline for return extensions.  Normally we have a lot more people scrambling in now in a panic.  I'm sure now that I've said that, next week will be insane."

He chuckled.  "I suppose it's too much to hope for that people are planning ahead better suddenly, huh?"

"Definitely," I replied with a smile.  "Tell me about yours."

"Busy.  Paperwork busy, though, not case busy.  Now that summer is over, things usually slow down a little as far as cases, at least for a couple months."  We chatted easily until our food arrived, and then we ate.  After eating, he poured us each another glass of wine and we went back to the couch.  He didn't even bother with the TV.  We just sat and talked, and it was so comfortable, so familiar.  When I had finished my glass of wine, he took the empty glass from my hand and set it on the end table, along with his own almost empty glass. 

"Come here," he commanded softly, his voice husky.  I moved over to him, and he kissed me.  My lips parted automatically for him as his fingers moved into my hair.  He eased me backwards until I was laying across the couch.  I felt him, hard against my hip.  My hand moved to stroke him through his jeans, but I was suddenly self-conscious, not wanting to push too far if he didn't want to.  He sensed my hesitation and immediately stopped kissing me, looking seriously down at me.  "Do you want to stop?" he asked me.

I shook my head.  "No," I said firmly.  "Do you?"

He brought his lips back to mine, then trailed kisses from my mouth to my ear.  "No," he whispered.  "Not tonight.  Tonight I want as much of you as you'll give me."  Jesus.  Normally, I'd think that was such a lame and cheesy line, but for some reason, in this moment those words practically made my panties fall off all by themselves. 

I gripped his shirt in my fists and kissed him hard, and he kissed me back hungrily.  "Bedroom," he growled, standing and pulling me to my feet.  This was a totally different side of the quietly confident man I had gotten to know, and I liked bossy, demanding Damien.  I liked knowing that it was me that caused him to be bossy and demanding.  He led me to his bedroom and pulled off my shirt as he was kicking the door closed.  Next was my bra, then my pants.  He backed me up to the bed but I stopped him.

"No fair," I quipped, starting to unbutton his shirt.  He yanked it off over his head instead and stepped out of his jeans, leaving us both in just our underwear.  Then I was laying on my back across his bed.  He flicked his tongue across one nipple, while his fingers teased the other, gently pulling on it and rolling it between thumb and forefinger.  I groaned and arched up against him, desperate for more.  His hand slid down my stomach, across my hips, down one thigh and up the other, touching me everywhere but where I needed him to.  Finally, he tugged my underwear to the side and slid one finger, then two, inside me.  I moaned and gripped his arms tightly as he moved them, slowly at first, then faster.

"Please," I breathed.  He looked at me, dark eyes smoldering.  "I need..."  But I couldn't manage to say anything else.

"This?" he asked, pressing his thumb against me.

"Yes," I gasped as I came violently, arching up nearly off the bed.  I was still dazed and sensitive when he slid down the bed and dragged my underwear down my legs.  I barely managed to lift my hips to help him.  I felt his lips travel up my thigh, until he gently nipped the very top of my inner thigh.  Then his mouth was on me, teasing, licking, and sucking, and I was incapable of forming any sort of lucid thought. 

I was coming down from my second orgasm when I heard a drawer slide open.  I opened my eyes and looked at him.  My eyes traveled his sculpted body before landing on his hand.  He held up a condom.  "Do you want to keep going?" he asked softly.

"Yes," I replied, blinking to try to clear my head.  "But I'm going to need a couple minutes to recover first."  He chuckled and laid down next to me, drawing his hand up my hip, stomach, and chest to stroke the back of my neck.

"Take as many minutes as you need," he said, kissing my cheek.  I turned my head so our lips met and we kissed lazily for several seconds before I sat up and pushed him onto his back.  He lifted his hips so I could roll his boxers down and off.  I stroked him several times before taking him into my mouth.  "Jesus, Kinsley," he groaned, his hands fisting in my hair.  

After maybe 30 seconds, he used his grip on my hair to tilt my face gently up towards him.  I stopped and looked at him.  "You need to stop, I don't want to finish like this."  I nodded, and he pulled me back up towards him.  He had the condom on in seconds and was on top of me.  He kissed me as he pushed into me and I moaned against his mouth.

After all the buildup, it didn't last long, but it didn't matter.  The second round went much longer, and by the time we finished the third, I was wondering if I'd be able to walk in the morning.  Finally, we were both spent.  He tried to pull me into a spooning position but I involuntarily stiffened.  Physical touch that wasn't leading to sex was another strange area for me.  He withdrew his arm immediately, leaving just his hand on my hip.  I rolled over to face him and nudged him onto his back.  I scooted up against his side and dropped my head onto his chest.  There, that was much more comfortable for me.  He tentatively wrapped an arm around my back and when I relaxed into him, he brought his other hand up to my shoulder, stroking down my arm.

"Not used to cuddling after sex?" he teased me.  Coming from anyone else, I would have been affronted, but since it was coming from him, I laughed.

"No, I'm not," I admitted.  "I think I could get used to it though."  His hand continued its slow, lazy path up and down my arm, and my eyelids grew heavy.  "You know," I mused sleepily, "Maybe there is some value in waiting awhile and not just jumping into bed."

"Oh yeah?" he asked, his hand pausing before continuing its descent down my arm.    "Why do you say that?"

"Because that is easily the best sex I've ever had."

He laughed softly.  "I'd hazard a guess that we can attribute maybe 25% of that to waiting a little bit."

"And the other 75%?" I asked curiously.

"That probably has more to do with that 'strange effect' I have on you."  I could hear the smirk in his voice, and I blushed remembering my drunken confession a couple weeks before.  "And maybe a little bit of the strange effect you have on me."  That soothed my burning cheeks and I smiled against his chest. 

I laid there until I could barely keep from falling asleep.  Then I sat up and stretched.  "I should get going," I said.

He sat up too, and looked at me in confusion.  "You can stay," he offered.

"Thank you, but I'm going to go home," I replied.  Now he looked confused and slightly hurt.

"Are you okay?" he asked, as I pulled my clothes back on.

I looked up at him and nodded.  I was trying to figure out how to explain why I didn't want to stay.  Once I wrestled my shirt back over my head I sat down on the edge of the bed.  "I'm great, better than I've been in a long time," I assured him.

"Then why are you leaving?" he asked, standing and pulling his jeans on.  I was impressed.  That question could have easily come out as a challenge, but instead it was pure curiosity.

I was still struggling to figure out how to explain it to him, about how there was nothing more vulnerable than being asleep next to someone you hadn't known for long, and that was terrifying to me, when I was hit with a sudden inspiration.  "You know how you wanted to move slowly physically?  Because sex is important, and intimate, and you wanted it to be part of a more meaningful relationship this time?"  He nodded.  "To me, sleeping next to someone is even more intimate than sex.  It's allowing yourself to be completely vulnerable with them.  And I've never shared that with any guy."

I could tell by his face that he was processing this information.  I gave it some time to sink in, then I took a deep breath and plowed forward.  "I want to share it with you, but I'm not ready."

His face softened when I told him that and he nodded again before standing and walking over to me.  He pulled me to my feet and stood, holding my hands in each of his.  "You've never spent the night with a guy?" he asked.  I shook my head.  I was anxious.  Did he think this was weird?  Did he think that there was something wrong with me?  That something awful had happened to make me this way?  Troy did--my last "relationship", in college.  I was always having to justify not spending the night.  I never, not in four months, trusted him enough to stay.

"I understand," he said softly.  "I hope I'll be the first....when you're ready."  I was relieved, so relieved that he didn't think I was crazy.  Or if he did, that he didn't say so out loud.  He smiled at me.  "Thank you for explaining," he said. 

"Thank you for not telling me I'm a crazy person," I said back, grinning, desperate for a joke to lighten the intensity of what had just transpired.

"There are plenty of things you do that are crazy," he teased, "but this is not one of them."

He walked me to the door, and I almost didn't leave.  The sight of him in just his low slung jeans made me want to shove him up against the wall and fuck him senseless.  Again.  At the door, he turned to me and said, "Can I see you tomorrow?"

"I have plans tomorrow with Olivia and Lauren," I reported with disappointment.  "Sunday?"

"Sunday works.  I'll call you tomorrow and we'll figure out what we're going to do."  He glanced at the clock, then turned concerned eyes back to me.  "It's late.  Let me know that you made it home, please?"

"I will," I promised.  "Goodnight, Damien."

He kissed me tenderly, pulling away just before I would have insisted on staying for just 15 minutes more, and said, "Goodnight Kinsley."

The Boss

My last two days of work were completely uneventful.  I finished all my paperwork by mid-afternoon on Tuesday and spent the next hour packing up my stuff and saying goodbye to my coworkers.

I was out of the office by 4, and not ready to go home yet.  It was actually pretty mild outside, so I dumped my stuff in my car and walked to a coffee shop halfway between my now-former office and Brody's office.  I picked up two coffees and walked the rest of the way to Brody's office.  I scanned the directory of the huge building and took the elevator up to the 8th floor suite.

The receptionist regarded me coolly as I approached the desk.  "Hi, I'm here to see Brody Adler," I said cheerfully.

She smirked at me.  "Mr. Adler is very busy.  Do you have an appointment?"

"I don't, and I understand if he's with a client or in a meeting, but could you maybe just call him and tell him that Olivia is here, please?"  I gave her my sweetest smile, not that it mattered much.  I could just call him myself.  She rolled her eyes and picked up the phone with an expression on her face that said that she was just humoring me.  Her face registered surprise after speaking quietly to him, and it was my turn to smirk at her as she hung up the phone and stood.

"He asked me to bring you back immediately," she said scornfully.  Then she stood and strode away without another word.  I followed her quickly as she turned right and left through the maze of hallways.  The office was much bigger than it looked from outside.  Finally, she stopped and knocked at a closed door.  It swung open right away and Brody smiled widely.

"Hi," he greeted me.  "If I would have known you were coming I would have arranged a bit of a warmer welcome."  He turned to his receptionist and smiled warmly.  "This is my girlfriend, Olivia.  Please let me know right away if she swings by again in the future."  The receptionist snorted derisively and stalked off.  I handed him the coffee I had gotten him and he smiled even wider.  "This is perfect, I'm in serious need of a caffeine fix."  He motioned me and pulled the door shut.  He leaned down and kissed me, a gentle, lingering kiss.  "And I was also in serious need of that.  What are you doing here?"

"I got done with work and wasn't ready to go home, so I thought I'd swing by and hoped you weren't completely swamped.  I won't stay long, I know you're busy."

"I can always take a break for you," he assured me.  "Thank you for the coffee, and sorry about Arlene.  She's damn good at her job, but she's not the friendliest.  Usually that works, but I'm sorry if she was rude to you."

"Nah, she was just doing her job," I said, sitting next to him on a small sofa that faced his windows overlooking downtown Denver.  I looked around his office, which was huge.  We sat and talked for about 10 minutes before he frowned at his computer, which kept making the chiming sound that signified a new email.

"I'll get going and let you get back to work," I said, standing.

"Sorry," he said, sliding an arm around my waist.  "I'd better get this stuff all wrapped up so I don't have to do it while we're in Wisconsin."

"Don't apologize," I said firmly.  "I'm the one that showed up unannounced in the middle of the day.  I'll see you in the morning, right?"  He nodded and kissed me.  I started to pull away, but he tightened his arm around me and kissed me harder.

"Actually, I think I can spare just a couple more minutes," he murmured in my ear before kissing my neck. His hand slid up my leg, under my skirt, and started to pull on my tights.

"What about...?"  I trailed off, looking back over my shoulder at the door.

He laughed, a low growling sound against my shoulder.  "I'm the boss.  No one comes in without my permission."  He worked my tights over my hips and down my thighs, then pushed my underwear to the side.  I gasped and pushed my hips towards his hand as he touched me.  A knock sounded at the door as I was unbuckling his belt.

"I'm on the phone!" he barked out.  Silence, then receding footsteps.  "See?" he asked, nipping at my earlobe.  "Nothing to worry about."  He pushed me back gently on the sofa and helped me push his pants out of the way.  He slid my skirt up above my hips and pushed into me.  I moaned as he ground his hips against mine.  He put a finger against my lips.  "No one will come in, but I'm not sure how soundproof the walls are," he teased, before thrusting hard.  I bit my lip and pressed my face into his chest. 

When we were finished, we laid tangled together on the tiny couch.  "That was totally worth the extra half hour I'll have to stay tonight to make up for it," he said, nuzzling my hair.

The intercom on his phone buzzed, and his receptionist's crisp, icy voice echoed through the office.  "Jim Moser is here," she said.  Brody quickly disentangled himself from me and buckled his belt as he walked back to his desk.

"I'll be out for him in 5 minutes," he said, pushing the intercom button.  He showed me the bathroom attached to his office and I quickly pulled myself back together.  When I came out, he slipped his arms around my waist and kissed me.  "Thanks for stopping by," he said.  "I'll walk you out."  He kept his hand on my lower back as we walked back through the hallways.

At the front desk he brushed his lips against my cheek.  "I'll see you in the morning," he whispered.  Then he turned to the man with the surly look on his face sitting across from the desk and smiled broadly.  "Mr. Moser, so sorry about the wait.  Did Arlene offer you something to drink?"  I caught the man's sour expression softening as I walked to the elevators.  Apparently, the effect of Brody's charm wasn't even limited to women.

I went home and packed, and finished wrapping the Christmas gifts I was taking with us.  I had had a bunch of stuff already shipped to my parents' house when I thought I wasn't going to be able to make it home, so luckily I just had a few last minute things to bring. 

I was getting ready for bed around 10 when my phone rang.  It was Brody, wondering if he could just come tonight.  I agreed, and then swapped my sweatpants and baggy t-shirt for a pair of leggings and a fitted tank top.  What?

I greeted Brody cheerfully when I pulled open the door.  He stepped in and kissed me, his fingers gripping my hips.  "Hi," he said.  "Missed you."

"Really?  It's been all of 6 hours," I said with a laugh.

"Yeah, well, I wasn't quite ready for you to leave.  Stupid work."  He kissed me again.

"Slow your roll," I said, putting both hands on his chest.  "Don't you want your present?"

"This afternoon wasn't my present?" he asked, grinning.

I shook my head.  "No, but it was probably more fun than your present.  Your present is a little more practical."  I grabbed the wrapped package off the kitchen table and pressed it into his hands.  He sat down on the couch and unwrapped it carefully.  He took the top off the box and pulled out a new leather briefcase.

"Your old one was falling apart," I said.  "It's not as awesome as--"

He cut me off.  "I love it.  It's way better than the old one, and I probably just would have gotten a boring one, so this one is great."  He smiled and kissed me.  "Thank you."  I was glad he seemed to genuinely like it.  I had never been an awesome gift giver, and he had set a high bar with the plane tickets.  "Come here," he said, pulling me towards him.  I settled back against his chest and he wrapped his arms around me.  "Excited to go home?" he asked, running his fingers down my forearm.

I nodded.  "Yes, and happy it's under better circumstances this time," I said.

"How's Lynn?"

"She was doing pretty well when I talked to her this weekend.  They moved her to a rehab facility.  They think she'll be there about a month or so before she's able to go home, but they said that aside from some lingering memory issues, she should be able to make almost a full recovery.  She'll have to stop teaching though, at least for awhile."  This made me the most sad.  She loved teaching. 

Brody tightened his arms around me.  "I'm glad she'll be okay."  I wondered if he was thinking about his sister, and I turned slightly so I could squeeze his arm.  I slid my hand up and massaged his upper arm gently.   We sat there for awhile, and then he kissed me, sliding his hand down my back to my hip.  "It's getting late," he commented.

"It is," I agreed.

"Bed?" he asked, lowering his lips to my neck.  I agreed with that, too.

Lauren Doesn't Giggle

On Friday, after I said goodbye to my last client, some of my coworkers took me out for drinks.  The plan was for me to hang out with them for a few hours, then Brody was going to meet me there and we were going to go have dinner and drinks with Lauren, Kinsley, and Alex.  We were meeting them at 8, so Brody was planning to get there around 7:30 or 7:45.

We left the office at 5, and my soon-to-be-former-coworkers were keeping my drinks full.  I was feeling it by a little after 7.  When Sam said she was going up to the bar for one more round, I didn't protest, though I probably should have.  She was gone for awhile, and suddenly Charlotte said, "Looks like Sam found a hot guy to flirt with up at the bar."  I craned my neck to look and saw that the hot guy that Sam was flirting with happened to be Brody.  She had a hand on his arm and was standing about 3 inches away from him, talking animatedly.  For his part, Brody looked awfully uncomfortable and was scanning the bar, likely looking for me.

"I'll be right back," I said, quickly slipping away from the table and up to the bar.  I walked up to Sam and Brody and smiled.  "Hi," I said, looking at Brody.

"There you are!" he exclaimed, the relief on his face evident.  He slid an arm around my waist and kissed my cheek.  Sam looked surprised and took a half step back.

"You're..." she started, then trailed off.

"Sam, I see you've met my boyfriend, Brody,"  I said, smiling kindly.  I felt bad since she didn't know, and I didn't want to embarrass her.

"Yes, I guess I have," she said, her face red.  Brody turned to the bar to take a drink from the bartender and pay, and Sam mouthed, "I'm so sorry!" to me.  I shook my head and smiled again.  Sam turned and hurried back to the table.

"You're early," I said, when Brody turned back, drink in hand.  "You should have let me know, I'd have looked for you."  I wobbled a little and he tightened his arm around my waist to steady me.

"I am early," he agreed.  "I got done with work early and thought I'd swing by and have a drink with you guys before we take off.  And then I got accosted by her."  He nodded towards the table.

"She's really quite lovely," I assured him with a laugh.  He looked at me skeptically.  When we got to the table, he put his drink down and excused himself to go to the restroom.

"I thought he looked familiar!" Leigh hissed, as soon as he was out of earshot.  "Isn't that the guy that showed up at the office a couple months back?"  I confirmed, mildly embarrassed at the memory of Brody showing up unexpectedly to confront me about not telling him about Savannah's little plan after Allie spilled the beans to me.  "He's gorgeous, nice work!"

"I am mortified," Sam said.  "I am seriously so sorry, if I would have known--"

I cut her off.  "Don't worry, I'm not upset.  I promise!"  I assured her.

"She's probably used to other girls hitting on him," Charlotte said with a shrug.  "You don't get to enjoy having a boyfriend that looks like that without having to deal with girls flirting with him."  For some reason, talking about how hot Brody was was making me uncomfortable, and I was relieved when Leigh whispered that he was coming back.  Everyone quickly shifted to free up a chair next to me.  Brody kissed my cheek as he sat down, which made me blush.

We sat for about a half hour, and then it was time for us to head out to meet Lauren, Kinsley, and Alex.  I started to get a little irritated by the way they were all giggling at Brody.  You'd think they'd never been in the presence of a man before.  "Your coworkers are a lively bunch," Brody commented mildly as we walked out.  I burst into laughter.

"Something like that," I said.  "Sorry about Sam."

"You're sorry that I got hit on?" he teased.  "I'm not, it helps me feel young again."

"Yes, because 30 is so very old," I agreed.  "Especially when you don't look a day over 25.  It must be hard."

"Says the 26 year old that gets carded regularly," he joked back.  "And it's not because they card everyone that looks under 50!"  It was true.  Between my height and my round face, I was constantly hearing that I looked like I was much younger than 26.  Everyone assured me that some day I'd be thankful for it, but for now I wasn't a huge fan.

 "I'll be 27 soon!" I shot back.  "That's pretty much the official old age cut-off."  Brody laughed and shook his head.  My birthday was in January, and it seemed odd to be to be crossing officially into "late 20s."

We got to the restaurant to meet up with Lauren, Kinsely, and Alex a few minutes before 8.  Alex and Lauren were there already and had gotten us a table.  I noticed that they seemed to be sitting a little closer than necessary, and Lauren shifted to the side a little when she saw us walking up.  Interesting.

Kinsley got there a few minutes later, and we quickly ordered drinks and appetizers.  I went with water for the moment, because I didn't feel like needing to be carried home tonight.  We enjoyed our dinner and it was nice to see Lauren, Kinsley, and Alex again.  Between Lynn's accident and wrapping things up at work, it had been over a week since I last saw them.

Kinsley and I went to the bathroom after we ate.  "So what's going on with Lauren and Alex?" she asked me as we walked.

"I was going to ask you!" I exclaimed.  "I caught them whispering twice."

"She's giggling at him," Kinsley said.  "Lauren doesn't giggle."  I agreed.  I filled her in on how they were sitting when Brody and I arrived.  "I'm going to ask her," she decided.  "Later, obviously."

I made Kinsley promise to fill me in.  I hoped there was something going on.  I loved the idea of Lauren and Alex.  We swore we'd let each other know as soon as either of us found something out.

"What are your plans for the weekend?" Brody asked as we left.

"Sleeping!" I responded immediately.  "And being lazy.  This week was insane, and I still don't feel caught up on my sleep from last weekend."

"No kidding," Brody agreed.  "And that sounds like an excellent idea.  Want some company for your weekend plans?"

"Yes, please," I replied.  "Can we stay at your house?  I feel like being out of the city will help me relax and be lazy.  I won't be tempted to do anything crazy like go to the gym."  

"Good idea.  We should stop and pick up some groceries so we have food and don't even have to leave the house if we don't want to," he suggested.

"Perfect. This is going to be the best weekend ever."

Brody raised his eyebrows.  "It doesn't take much to keep you happy, huh?  A few groceries and no plans."

We stopped at my house so I could get clothes and stuff for the weekend, then stopped for groceries.  We were settled on Brody's couch with a movie by 11pm.  I laid with my head in his lap, not even watching the movie.  I closed my eyes as his fingers moved through my hair absently, dragging lightly across my scalp and neck.

"I've seen you almost every day this week," he mused, snapping me out of my near-sleep daze.

"Mmhm," I replied sleepily.  "It's been awesome."

"It has," he agreed.  "I wish I could see you this often all the time." 

I ended up falling asleep, and woke up when Brody stood.  "Sorry," he said softly.  "I was trying not to wake you, but we might as well just go to bed."  I nodded and yawned as he offered me a hand and pulled me to my feet.

Once I was in bed, I fell asleep almost immediately and I'm pretty sure I didn't even move until I was woken up by Brody's phone ringing early the next morning.  I rolled over, confused by the sudden intrusion into my sleep.  Brody was already sitting up.  "Sorry," he said, grabbing his phone and heading into the hallway.  I groped on the nightstand for my phone and saw that it was barely 7am.  I groaned and rolled over to go back to sleep.

I have no idea how long Brody was on the phone, but it was long enough for me to fall back asleep.  I woke up again when he sat down on the edge of the bed next to me.  "Liv?" he said softly.

"Hmm?" I said groggily, squinting against the light filtering in around the curtains.

"I've got to go into the office for a little bit," he said.  I rolled onto my back and saw he was already dressed in a button down shirt and dark wool pants.  "I have an angry client.  Stay here and sleep.  I shouldn't be more than a couple hours.  I'll call you if it'll be longer, but I should be back by 10."

"Okay," I said.  "Good luck."

He smiled wryly.  "Thanks, I'll need it."  He kissed me and left, and I went back to sleep easily.

The next time I woke up was when Brody climbed back into bed with me.

"You're back," I said unnecessarily as he settled behind me, wrapping his arm around my waist.  "How's your client?"

"Less angry," he replied, pressing his forehead against my neck.  "I think I fixed it, we'll see.  I can't believe you're still sleeping."

"I wasn't kidding when I said I wanted to sleep and be lazy all weekend."

"I guess not," he said.  He moved his forehead from where it was nestled against my neck and replaced it with his mouth.  His lips slid along my neck from near my shoulder up towards my ear and he said softly, "But I want you to be awake now."  As he spoke, he trailed his fingertips across my hip and down my leg, then back up it. 

"You might be able to convince me that being awake is a good idea," I said, arching my back slightly as his hand slid up my stomach, under my shirt.

When Brody was done convincing me that being awake was definitely a good idea, I finally dragged myself out of bed.  We took a ridiculously long shower together, and by the time we made it downstairs, I was starving.  We made a delicious brunch of omelets and french toast and then settled onto the couch to spend the rest of the day being lazy.

We spent most of Sunday morning being lazy too, and Brody's phone was mercifully quiet.  He deserved an uninterrupted day off, and I was crossing my fingers and hoping that it would stay quiet for the rest of the day for him.

By lunchtime, though, we were both getting tired of being lazy.  It was sunny and reasonably warm outside, so we decided to go for a walk.  I don't care if it's a total old married couple thing to do...going for a walk on a weekend afternoon is the best.

I admired the other houses as we walked around.  "I love this neighborhood," I said.  The houses here were spaced quite far apart, with big yards and mature trees.  It was just far enough out of the city to have some space and quiet, but close enough to be convenient, most of the time.  "If I ever got tired of living in the city, I'd want to live in a neighborhood like this."

"Oh yeah?" Brody asked, looking at me.  "With 2.5 kids, a dog, and a white picket fence?"

I rolled my eyes.  "No to the 2.5 kids, yes to the dog, and maybe to the white picket fence.  Depends on if it goes with the house."

Brody nodded.  "Duly noted.  You seem like more of a 4 or 5 kid person anyway."

When I looked at him in horror, he had to stop walking because of how hard he was laughing.   "Relax, I'm just kidding," he assured me, once he had gotten himself together.  "No kids?"

I shrugged as we continued walking.  "Someday, I guess.  But not any time soon.  And definitely not 4 or 5!  More like one.  Maaaaaybe two.  Depends on how much I like the first one."

"So the fence depends on the house, and Kid #2 depends on Kid #1.  I feel like I should be taking notes.  Does Kid #1 depend on how much you like the dog?"  He was smirking at me, and I smacked him in the arm.

"Kid #1 depends on how much I like his or her potential father," I replied, returning his smirk.   "What about you?"

He answered without even thinking.  "Kids?  One, someday. And a dog, maybe two."

"Hmmm, that's not what I would have thought," I replied.

"Oh really?  What would you have thought?" he replied.

"Let's see...for you I'm thinking 4 kids--all boys, of course, 3 cats, and a chain link fence because you have horrible taste."

Now we were both laughing.  "Careful," he warned me.  "Those 4 boys, 3 cats, and chain link fence could someday be yours too.  What's that say about your taste?"

"You want to have a chain link fence with me?" I teased, not quite able to bring myself to confirm that maybe, someday, he might want to have kids and pets and a house....with me.

"No!" he exclaimed, still laughing.  "I hate chain link fences.  We can have whatever kind of fence you want, as long as it'll contain the dog and it's not chain link."  I grinned at him.  "What?" he asked.

"You're already letting me call the shots for our hypothetical future home.  That doesn't bode well for you."  He chuckled.  I paused, then said, "And you're also talking about our hypothetical future home.  And dog."

"Yeah, I guess I am," he said.  "Is that weird?"  We had both stopped walking, and he was watching me carefully, gauging my reaction.

"Kind of," I admitted.  "But not bad weird.  It's just weird for me to talk about the future.  I've actually never had the 'future' talk with a guy before, even kind of joking and casually like this."

"Not even with John?" he asked curiously.

"No...it just never really came up.  This came up so casually I almost didn't even realize we were doing it until you said the boys, cats, and chain link fence could be mine someday.  Which, by the way?  No thanks!"  I laughed, uncomfortable with how serious the conversation had just gotten.  Brody and I had gone from 0 to 60 incredibly quickly, and as much as I hated to admit it, I loved the idea of our house, our kids, and our pets.  But that thought freaked me out a little too, and I was getting a little squirmy under Brody's serious gaze.

He grinned, reading my discomfort.  "Hey, don't look at me like that," he said.  "The 4 boys, 3 cats, and chain link fence were your ideas."  When I relaxed a little, he put his arm around my shoulders and we continued walking.  "Seriously though, Liv.  I like talking about the future, but I promise I won't ask you to marry me next week, okay?  I think I'll wait at least another month."   

"You can't say 'seriously though, Liv' and then make a joke!" I said, laughing.  I was grateful that he seemed to understand that it was the conversation that made me uncomfortable, not actually thinking about the future.  I liked thinking about it, but saying it out loud made me anxious.  Even though I had stopped waiting for the other shoe to drop, I couldn't help not wanting to jinx anything.

I snuck my arm between us so I could wrap it around Brody's back as we walked.  "Your neighbors are probably rolling their eyes at us," I hypothesized, as we walked down the road with our arms around each other.

"Nah, they're too busy with their 2.5 kids and dogs," he replied, tightening his arm around my shoulder and kissing the top of my head.

I pressed my body closer to his as I thought about someday having kids.  The thought made me smile, though it was slightly overwhelming, and I decided to stick to focusing on the present for now.

(Now) Kinsley: Not My Type

This is a "current" Kinsley series.  It takes place over the course of several weeks starting in September (about the time Liv met James).
___________________________________

I looked down at my phone and got a little giddy when I saw it was Damien.  I took a breath before I answered, not wanting to sound completely ridiculously excited.  "Hello?"

"Hey," he replied.  "Can I see you tomorrow?"  I loved how he cut to the chase, but wasn't over confident or pushy.

"Yes, what do you want to do?" I asked.

"It's been a long week, do you want to just come over?  We can order something for dinner," he suggested.

My pulse picked up a little and I had to stop myself from answering "YES!" right away.  I took a breath, then said, "Sure, that sounds good."  If I played my cards right, maybe I could finally get in his pants.  This would be our 7th date, and we had yet do more than making out and some wandering hands.  I was dying, and I had no idea how he had held out this long.  If he didn't tell me constantly how beautiful I was, I would be concerned that he wasn't attracted to me.

Okay, actually, I was a little concerned that he wasn't attracted to me.  Not really because of anything he'd done, but just because my imagination was running wild with me.  I was used to second guessing everyone's intentions and I'd be lying if I said I knew any other ways to show someone they're attractive to me besides sex.  When I really thought about it though, he'd shown me in so many ways that not only was he attracted to me, but I meant a lot more than that to him.

He'd told me after a few dates that he'd broken off an engagement about a year ago and was just starting to actually date again.  I let my imagination fill in what he'd been doing for the last year, but I didn't care.  That's essentially what I'd been doing for the last year (or five) too. 

I was actually prepared to do that with Damien too, but he had some sort of inexplicable pull on me that made me want more than just sex.  I thought back over the first times I'd enjoyed his company, trying to figure out what it was about him...

We'd been out for happy hour when some guy had run into Liv, spilling her drink.  While he took her up to the bar to get a new one, the guys he had been with just sort of filtered into our group.  I had been completely absorbed in my phone, not feeling how crowded this bar was, when someone said, "You're empty.  Can I buy you another?"

I looked up in surprise, not expecting to look up into a face that was handsome and friendly.  "Um, sure, that would be nice," I replied.  Um, sure, that would be nice? I mocked myself in my head.  I'm reasonably certain that phrase had never come out of my mouth before.  He gestured for me to head towards the bar, and I did.

"My name is Damien," he said, after we had ordered drinks.

"I'm Kinsley," I said.  He repeated it carefully to make sure he had it right, something I was used to.  I smiled when he got it on the first try.  Pretty impressive for a loud, crowded bar.

"So Kinsley, what do you do?" he asked.  "That's what you're supposed to ask people after you buy them a drink, right?"

I laughed.  "Yeah, I think so," I replied.  "I'm a CPA."

He looked surprised for a second, but quickly caught himself.  "You're the prettiest CPA I've ever met," he said.

I rolled my eyes.  "Have you met many CPAs?" I challenged.

"Only the one that does my taxes, and I don't find him attractive in the least," he bantered back, with a completely straight face.

I couldn't help but laugh again.  "That's quite the trick."  He cocked his head slightly and gave me a questioning look.  "I'm sure I should feel insulted, but I don't."

He grinned.  "You shouldn't."  Even though he was clearly hitting on me, something about it was completely different than any guy who had ever flirted with me before.  Maybe it was that he was soft spoken, or that he didn't seem to take himself too seriously.  Or maybe it was just that he was not my type.  I was used to being hit on by tall, blonde, musclebound jocks, and that's the way I liked it usually.  This guy was maybe 5'10" at best, dark haired and eyed, and lean.  But his forearms were well muscled and I was sure the rest of him was too, even if he wasn't huge.

We walked back to the table with our drinks.  "Thank you," I said, shyly.  Then I remembered my social skills.  "What do you do?"

"I'm a detective," he replied.  "The guy that spilled your friend's drink used to be my partner when we were both patrol officers."

"Huh, well I bet that isn't boring," I said.

He chuckled.  "That's pretty accurate," he responded.

We chatted until Lauren dragged me away to leave.  I was drawn to his quiet confidence and the way his dark eyes stayed locked on my face and didn't wander too much, at least not while I was looking at him.  I stalled when I was saying goodbye, hoping he might ask for my number.  He didn't though, and I couldn't bring myself to ask for his.  Oh well.  He's not my type anyway.

When Liv and I had been at that new restaurant and James and Damien came in, I quickly made the decision to invite them to join us, even though I knew Liv would be pissed.  I was willing to deal with Liv later, because I needed to talk to Damien again.

It's a good thing Liv decided to converse with James because I was almost completely unaware of them the entire time.  Damien and I interacted almost exclusively with each other, and I knew I'd be doing some apologizing to Liv.  But for some reason, I just couldn't draw my attention away from him. 

As we walked out, Damien said, "I'd like to see you again.  Can I take you out sometime?"  My stomach turned 3 backflips as I nodded, forgetting how to use words for a second. We exchanged numbers and made plans to go out that Thursday.  I was seriously giddy, and I felt like I was in high school all over again.

Our first actual date was a balancing act for me: finding the perfect mix of showing him I was interested, without showing too much of anything.  Giving too much away made me anxious.  What if he decided he wasn't actually interested in me, but I had already shown my hand?  I'd feel so stupid.  At the same time, I had learned the hard way that if I gave away nothing, I might give him the impression I wasn't interested in him, which would be just as bad.  I spent so much time trying to stay completely in control of what I was showing him, that I honestly don't even remember what we talked about.  It was a nice date though, simple.  He'd turned out to be a guy that didn't plan elaborate, creative dates, and I liked that about him.  It was way less about impressing me, and more about getting to know each other.

I think it was the simplicity, along with his openness about his past and willingness to be vulnerable, that started to crack my walls.  It was a little terrifying at first, and I scrambled for control.  But, my birthday was my undoing.  I should have known better than to drink so much, but after he finally kissed me, I couldn't even deny to myself anymore that I was totally head over heels for this guy that I hadn't known for very long.

I had walked into the house to use the bathroom shortly after Damien and James had arrived.  When I came out, he was leaning against the kitchen counter, waiting for me.  I was already a little drunk, so I'm sure I bounded over eagerly when he motioned to me.  "Did I tell you that you look beautiful?" he asked softly, his fingers brushing lightly over my hair.

"You did," I replied, smiling.  "Thank you."  He smiled back, then slipped his arm around my waist and pulled me gently closer to him.  My heart rate picked up as he glanced at my lips before bringing his eyes back to mine.  He leaned forward and touched his lips to mine, softly, briefly.  The second they touched, I wanted him to fuck me right there on the counter.  Then he pulled away and I almost melted from the smoldering look he gave me.

I took a half step closer to him so our hips were touching, and he tangled his fingers in my hair and kissed me again, with an intensity that left my legs shaking and the breath running from my lungs.  When he pulled back this time, he rested his forehead gently against mine and said, "I just wanted to do that before you were too drunk to appreciate it."

I wanted to kiss him again, but Kevin came in, breaking the spell.  I reluctantly pulled away, grateful that we hadn't been interrupted sooner at least.

I spent the rest of the day on cloud 9, but still managed to get sloppy drunk.  Just before we went out to the bar, I stole a second alone with Damien.  I avoided kissing him, not wanting to ruin the perfect kiss from earlier with a sloppy, drunken kiss now, but before I could lock down my mouth, the thoughts I'd been trying to keep to myself since the first night we met spilled out.  "You know, you have the strangest effect on me," I told him, stumbling a little over my words.

"Do I?" he asked, smiling slightly.  He looked amused, but not in a mocking way.

"You do," I confirmed.  "It's unnerving.  But I kind of like it."

He regarded me carefully, then said, "Do I get to know the nature of this strange, unnerving, but kind of pleasant effect I have on you?"  It took me a minute to wrap my drunk brain around his sentence, and for a second, I wondered if he purposely made it complicated to fuck with me.  But then I decided I didn't care if he did.

"I like you," I mumbled, looking down.  "A lot."

He gently tilted my head back up and said, "You say that like it's a bad thing."

"I don't know yet if it's a good thing or a bad thing," I replied, and this was easily the most honest and vulnerable I'd been around a man in years.  Since Michael, maybe, if you can even count that.  Emboldened by my drunkenness, I finished by asking, "What do you think?"

The slight grin playing at the corners of his mouth widened into a real smile.  He kissed me softly on the forehead and said, "I think that I want it to be a good thing for you.  I like you too, Kinsley.  A lot.  I like hearing your thoughts uninhibited.  Maybe you can try to do it more often when you haven't been drinking?"   

Fat chance of that, was my first thought.  But my second thought was the one that came out my mouth.  "I can try." This was different.  A man, sharing his thoughts with me.  I wasn't quite sure what to make of it, but it did make me want to try to open up.  At least right now it did, while I was drunk.  Even my skin felt like it was buzzing, just from being close to him.  And...the vodka probably also had something to do with it.

"Should we go?" he asked, brushing his thumb across my cheekbone.  I nodded, and I let him lead me outside.