I Need You Here

I'm posting what would have been tomorrow's post today, because tomorrow I have a bonus post from Brody's perspective.  I wanted a little more of the story posted before I posted that one.  I will warn you that Brody's post will contain some pretty tough stuff on death, as you can probably imagine.  It might be material that is sensitive to some readers.  If you choose to skip it, you won't really miss anything from the overall storyline.   

The next couple regular storyline posts are a little heavy too.  Let me know in the comments if you'd prefer to have them both this week, or break them up with a Lauren or Alex post later this week.
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I tossed and turned most of Tuesday night.  I got a text about an hour after I got in bed that Brody had arrived at his mom's house.  On Wednesday, I dragged myself into work about a half hour later than usual, glad that I had that flexibility, because I just couldn't seem to get moving that morning.  A few minutes after I arrived, Josh stuck his head in my office.  "I'm gonna go grab some coffee," he said.  "Do you want anything?"  His face was kind, with no hint of his usual smirk.  Either I looked as distraught as I felt, or he had heard the news from his brother-in-law.  I thanked him but refused.  I had already had a large dirty chai and anymore espresso would wind me up even more. 

I didn't know what time Brody's flight was leaving, so I had no idea when he might make it to Miami.  A perfunctory text mid-afternoon letting me know they had landed in Miami answered that question, but none of the other questions that were taking over my brain.  As much as I wanted to rush in and fix everything, I knew I couldn't, so I waited for him to tell me what he needed.

Luckily, I didn't have to wait too much longer.  He called late that evening.  "So I know I said I didn't want you here, but how would you feel about coming down for the weekend?" he asked.  "I just...I need you here.  This sucks, and my mom and sister are driving me crazy already."

"If you want me there, I'm there," I said.  I pulled out my laptop and we looked at tickets while we talked.  Brody booked me a ticket for Friday.  I'd get in in the late afternoon and leave Sunday afternoon, so I wouldn't be there for long, but I hoped I could at least get Brody's mind off everything for a little while.

Thursday passed in a slow-moving blur.  Friday morning I packed quickly, easily fitting everything into a carry-on, even with my overpacking ways.  I loved flying without checking luggage.  It made everything so much faster and easier.

When I got off the plane in Miami, I pulled out my phone and tried to call Brody.  He didn't answer, so I wandered towards arrivals, thinking I might find him there.  I was about to walk outside into the humid Miami air when I heard someone yell my name.  I turned and saw Jen waving at me.  I hurried over to her.  "Hi," she greeted me, hugging me tightly.  "Brody is stuck in a meeting with dad's attorney, and he left his phone at the hotel.  He asked me to come get you and bring you back to the hotel."

She opened the trunk of her rental car and I tossed my carry-on inside.  "How are you guys doing?" I asked her, once we were on our way out into traffic.

"It's a big pain," she admitted.  "Mom and I are just trying to power through some of his stuff, and Brody is handling a lot of the meetings with the attorney that's executor of the will.  Dad was prepared at least...but a lot of the stuff in the will is being seized for repayment of his debts.  The house is in foreclosure.  It's really just his company, which he left his shares of to Brody, and it sounds like Brody is probably going to sell.  He doesn't want anything to do with it at this point.  We're trying to get him to take some time to decide though.  The company is actually doing quite well and is still lucrative, and he wouldn't need to be present or involved to maintain possession of it.  I'm worried he'll regret selling it."

"How is he?" I asked quietly.

She frowned, and didn't say anything for several seconds.  "He's not good," she said finally.  "I'm not sure if he's slept at all.  He's not talking about anything of substance.  He's really snippy with us and he's obviously feeling the pressure of everything.  Plus, he was the last of us to really have any sort of relationship with Dad, so he's just having an all around tough time of it."  She paused, then glancing at me briefly, said, "I hope he talks to you, because if he doesn't do something soon, he's going to blow up."

When we got to the hotel, Jen showed me to Brody's room and handed me a keycard.  "He should be back in an hour or so, maybe two," she guessed.  "I need to head back to Dad's house and do a little more work for the day.  Mom and I are one floor above, in 319."  She gave me her cell phone number and Thalia's cell phone number and told me to call if I needed anything.  Before she left, she hugged me again and thanked me for coming.

I let myself into the room.  It was a simple suite, with a bedroom, a separate sitting room, and a small kitchen area.  I pulled open the fridge and saw 3 beers of a six-pack and a few bottles of water.  I decided to pick up some stuff to make dinner, since I knew that Brody sometimes forgot to eat when he got stressed and busy.  I left a note in case Brody came back while I was gone, grabbed my purse, and went down to the front desk for directions to the closest grocery store.

Two ridiculously expensive cab rides later, I let myself back into the room with stuff for dinner, another six pack of beer, and a bottle of wine.  Brody still wasn't back, so I jumped in the shower to get rid of the gross feeling that I always got from traveling.  By the time I was out and dressed, it was close to the hour that Jen had estimated, so I went ahead and started cooking in the tiny kitchen of the suite.

Dinner was mostly done when Brody walked in the door of the suite.  I turned off the stove, opened the fridge and pulled out a bottle of beer.  I held it up and Brody nodded as he walked over.  I dug through a drawer for a bottle opener, opened it, and handed it to him.  He took it, then set it down on on the counter and pulled me into a tight hug.  "I'm so glad to see you," he murmured.

When he finally pulled back, I looked up at him.  He had several day's worth of untrimmed facial hair taking over his jawline, and seriously dark circles under his eyes.  "I'm sorry I couldn't pick you up myself," he apologized.  "Was Jen there when you landed?"

"She was, and it's fine," I assured him.  "Are you hungry?"  He shrugged.  I frowned and grabbed plates and silverware out of the cabinets and drawer.  "Eat anyway," I said, putting food on a plate and handing it to him, along with his abandoned beer.

"Yes, ma'am," he said, giving me a tired half smile.

We sat down at the small table and ate quietly.  When we were done I took the plates over to the sink and washed them while Brody finished his beer, then went to take a shower.  When he got out of the shower I was in the bedroom, hanging up a couple shirts.  He surprised me by wrapping his arms around me from behind and kissing the back of my neck.  "You're overdressed," he whispered against my ear, before sucking gently on my earlobe.

I thought that it would be the rough, intense sex we usually had when Brody was stressed, angry, or upset about something, but it was exactly the opposite.  After, he rolled off of me but left his head against my shoulder and one arm draped across my stomach and hip.  I wiggled one arm under him so I could get my hand up to to his head, and I massaged his scalp, hoping to put him to sleep.

It must have been working, because his arm and head grew heavier. He shifted into a more comfortable position, and said, "I love you Liv.  Thank you for coming down."

"I love you too," I replied.  "Try to sleep."  He nodded against my shoulder.

I stayed awake, massaging his scalp until I was positive he had actually fallen asleep.  Then I shifted myself carefully into a position where my arm wouldn't fall asleep, and I was soon sleeping too.

When I woke, it was still dark, and the bed was empty next to me.  I rolled over and squinted at the clock.  It was a little after 2.  I got up and walked out of the bedroom into the main area of the suite.  Brody was sitting on the couch, staring blankly at some awful late night infomercial on TV.

"You should be sleeping," he said softly when he saw me.

"So should you," I pointed out, sitting down next to him.

"I did sleep," he protested.  He motioned to me.  "Lay down."  I raised an eyebrow at him and he quickly said, "Please."  I sighed softly.  I wasn't looking at him like that because he didn't say please.  But I did as he asked, and laid across the couch, laying my head on his leg.  His fingers immediately went to my hair, slipping through it, gently untangling the sleep-snarled strands.  I had a feeling it was just as relaxing for him as it was for me.

I let him play with my hair until all the strands were untangled and his fingers slid freely through.  My eyelids were so heavy at that point I was reasonably certain we'd both be spending the rest of the night on the couch if we didn't go back to bed soon.  "Come back to bed," I implored sleepily. 

"Okay," he agreed, surprising me.  I stood and offered him a hand, pulling him up from the couch.  When we got back into bed, he pressed his chest against my back and wrapped his arm tightly around me.  I was asleep within minutes.

When I woke up again, it was light in the room and Brody's arm was still draped over me.  I didn't dare move, not wanting to wake him up.  I laid there for about 15 more minutes, and then drifted back to sleep.  I woke up again when Brody's arm moved.

I rolled over and smiled at him.  He smiled back sleepily and said, "I actually slept."

"Good, because you looked like you needed it," I replied.

It was a little after 9.  Brody had a text from Jen that she and their mom had been up early and were already at the house.  "I should go help them," he said.  "What do you want to do?"

"What do you want me to do?" I asked.  "If you want me to go with you, I'd be more than happy to tag along and make myself useful.  Otherwise if you think it would be better if it was just you guys, I'll stay here.  Maybe go to the beach or something."

"You don't mind coming?" he asked.  I shook my head.  "Let's get some breakfast and we can head over there, then.  Don't bother showering, the place is a dump."

We made it downstairs just in time to grab some bagels and coffee as the hotel's continental breakfast was wrapping up. We made it to the house by 10, and I quickly got to work doing some cleaning while Brody, Jen, and Thalia sorted through personal affects.  I kept out of their way, feeling a bit like an intruder.

I heard raised voices from the room they were in a couple times, but around lunchtime, I clearly heard Brody yell, "I don't fucking care what you do with every single little thing, Jen!  Just figure it out, for Gods sake!  This is all so fucking ridiculous!"  Then I heard his loud, angry footsteps, and the slam of the front door.  A minute later, Jen appeared in the doorway of the kitchen, where I was currently working.

"Do something with him, please," she pleaded.  "He needs a break.  Get him out of here.  Mom and I can handle this for the rest of the day, but it's going to get really ugly soon if he's storming around snapping at us every time we look at him."  She looked exhausted and stressed, and I hurt for her.  "I love him and I feel for him Liv, but this will be easier without him here today."

"I understand," I said.  "I'll see what I can do."

"Thank you," she said gratefully.  I finished up what I was doing in the kitchen, giving Brody a few minutes to calm down.  I walked out the front door and found him sitting on the steps, elbows on his knees, head in his hands.

I sat down next to him and tentatively touched his back.  He didn't move, and I slid my hand up to his neck and massaged the tight muscles there.  "Do you want to get out of here?" I asked gently.

"I should help," he replied, his voice muffled by his hands.

"Brody, you need a break.  You'll be able to be a lot more helpful tomorrow if you just take the rest of today off.  And your family will like you better tomorrow if you take the rest of today off."

"Jen's pissed, huh?" he asked, looking up at me.

"She's not pissed, she's just tired and frustrated.  She knows you're struggling and she knows you need a break.  I don't think she's going to hold anything against you, but we need to go for today."  I didn't leave room for arguing this time, and I stood and held a hand out to him.  He stared at me for a couple seconds, as if contemplating arguing anyway, but then he took a deep breath and grabbed my hand and stood.

"Should we say bye?" he asked uncertainly.

"No, we should not," I replied.  "They know we're going."  He dutifully trailed me to the car.  I paused when we got there.  "Are you good to drive?  I can, but I have no idea where I'm going."

"I'm fine," he replied, taking out the keys and unlocking the doors.

When we were on the way the back to the hotel, I looked over at him.  "What should we do?" I asked. He shrugged.  "We're not going to sit in the room all day.  You need to blow off some steam.  What will help you relax a little?"

"Stop being such a fucking therapist," he snapped.  I took a deep breath and bit back my response, knowing he was just overwhelmed and grieving.  After several seconds of silence, he shook his head slightly.  "I'm sorry Liv.  That was shitty...I want to go to the beach."

"That sounds good to me," I said. 

When we got back to the room I threw together lunch with last night's leftovers.  Brody looked surprised, not even realizing it was after lunch time, but he sat and ate.  After we cleaned that up, we got ready for the beach.  I was glad I tossed my swim suit in my bag, just in case.

It was warm, in the high 80s, and super sunny and humid, so it was a good day for the beach.  After playing in the surprisingly warm water for a little bit, we both stretched out on the beach and enjoyed the sun as much as we could.

"What do you want to do tonight?"  Brody asked after awhile. 

"Hmmm, I hadn't really thought about it.  Did you have something in mind?"

"I don't know.  I don't want to sit in the room.  We could go out and do something," he replied.

"You could call Jack," I suggested.  "Does he know what's going on?"

Brody considered this for a second.  "He does, and that's actually a great idea."  He pulled out his phone and tapped the screen a few times before putting it to his ear.  "Hey," he said when Jack picked up.  "Yeah, thanks...it's going okay.  Jen kicked me out of the house today because I was being an asshole....I know.  Well, Liv's down here and I was thinking we might go out tonight, you have plans? ...That's perfect.  What time? ....Okay, sounds good, we'll meet you there."  He hung up without saying goodbye.  Why do guys do that?

"Dinner at 7:30 and then out for a couple drinks," Brody filled me in.  "He's apparently seeing some girl, he's bringing her too."

"That sounds like a good plan," I said.  We spent another hour or so on the beach and then headed back to the hotel to get ready for dinner.

While we were in the car, Brody glanced at me and said, "I'm sorry for my comment about being a therapist earlier.  I'm glad you pushed me to get out and do something, I actually feel a little bit better."  I assured him that I understood and that I was glad he felt better.

It was about 4:30 when we got back to the hotel and I decided I was going to take a short nap before we went out.  I tried to talk Brody into joining me, but he said he wanted to try to get some work done.  I didn't push it, and I fell asleep almost as soon as my head hit the pillow.
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Don't forget to let me know in the comments in you'd like Wednesday's post to be the regular storyline, or a Lauren/Alex post to break up the heavy a little.  Thanks for reading!