Lauren: Power Trip

I thought that I'd be nervous about being back at my old employer, but as I pull into the parking lot I'm as calm as can be.  I check my appearance in my visor mirror briefly, straighten a rogue piece of hair, then turn off my car and get out.  I'm precisely 4 minutes early.

People are starting to trickle out, leaving for the day, and I get a few a curious looks.  I wonder what kind of story Sean concocted to explain my absence.  I wonder if Logan straightened out any rumors, or contributed to them.  I could see it going either way, honestly.

Once inside, I walk straight up to the desk.  Kelly, the admin assistant sitting there, doesn't look surprised to see me so I imagine Sandra informed her I was coming.  "I'm here for an appointment with Sandra," I tell her.

"Okay," she replies placidly.  "I'll let her know you're here.  You can have a seat."  She gives me the smallest of knowing smiles at the end, but I don't return it before sitting down in the door closest to the the wing that houses HR.

I wait for over 10 minutes before Sandra comes out.  "Lauren, you're right on time," she says with an unconvincing smile plastered on her face.

"And you're not," I reply brightly, causing her fake smile to falter.

"Right, I'm sorry about that," she says, recovering quickly.  "I had something else I was finishing up."

I roll my eyes as she turns to lead me back through the twisting HR hallway to her office.  I've not spent much time over here, so the brief feeling of having no idea where we're going causes my confidence to waver slightly.  Luckily, as soon as we're in Sandra's office, it returns.

She motions to me to sit at the small round table that's in the corner of her office.  She collects a stack of paperwork and joins me.  "Did you have any questions before we get started?" Sandra asks me, handing me a pen.

"Yes, actually," I reply.  "I'd like to see the email that was sent from my account, on my behalf."

Sandra's eyes widen slightly, and she considers this.  "Fine," she answers finally.  "Let me print it.  You won't be able to take it with you, but you may look at here in my office."  She goes to her computer, clicks around a bit, and then I hear the printer in the corner come to life.  She returns to the table and hands me the page she printed.

I read over it.  It was definitely sent from my email account and it certainly does request a reduction in my responsibility due to the "overly stressful nature of my current role."  It also includes a request that all communication regarding the change in duties and job description go through Sean, as I'd like him to handle the transition so I can focus on wrapping up some of the projects I'm working on.  That explains why I never heard anything from HR about it, though it still seems strange to me.  Sean is a sneaky, manipulative bastard.

I had the page back to her calmly, even though I'm disgusted.  "Okay, I'm ready to look at the forms I need to sign."

"Great," she says, taking the first form off the stack and glancing at it, then sliding it over to me.  "This form lays out what you'll be receiving from us.  So you'll get the seven months of severance, paid biweekly on Mondays starting next Monday, and also the continued health insurance coverage, through the same 7 month time period."  She pauses and glances at me.  "Do you want to continue contributing to your 401k?"

"Absolutely," I reply.  If they're going to continue to match it, why would I turn down free money?

"So you'll need to check that box about halfway down the page.  That will continue through the seven months as well."  She pauses and waits, but I don't put my pen to the paper.  "Do you have questions?"

"I'm just reading through," I inform her.  She's out of her mind if she thinks I'm going to sign something without reading it.  "Also, I'm not signing anything until I see everything you want me to sign."

I glance up from the page to see her purse her lips briefly.  "Of course," she says, but it sounds forced.  I look back down at the form and then frown.

"All the dates on this form say 2015," I point out, sliding it back to her.

She blinks in surprise and the slightest flush creeps into her cheeks.  "They certainly do," she admits.  She looks at the next form and the pink on her cheeks darkens.  "I'll need a few minutes to fix these," she says, flipping through the other forms.

"That's fine," I say.  "I'd like to use the restroom, anyway."

Sandra directs me to the nearest bathroom, which is in a small alcove a hallway away from the main HR office hallway.  I make my way over there and use the single unisex bathroom then wash my hands.  I inspect myself in the mirror and determine that I did an excellent job picking out my outfit for this meeting.

When I walk out of the bathroom, I'm surprised to find Sean lurking in the hallway.  He looks just as surprised to see me.  The surprise on his face is quickly replaced with a sneer.  "Are you happy now?" he asks bitterly.

"Happy about what?" I ask calmly.

"About your little stunt.  I knew you were a vindictive little bitch."

"And what little stunt is that?" I reply.  I have no idea what he's talking about.

He rolls his eyes.  "Calling HR, ratting me out, landing me in all sorts of hot water.  I should have known you were up to something."

I laugh.  A full on, loud laugh as if he told a joke.  "First of all," I tell him, once I've gotten a hold of myself, "HR called me.  I didn't call HR.  Second of all, that is rich coming from you, considering you had an entire scheme to force me out of my position and into an assistant position.  I haven't quite worked out if your goal was to actually have me as your assistant or to get me to quit, but either way, it was awfully stupid of you to think you could get away with it."

He takes a step towards me and his nostrils flare.  It's not a good look for him.  I don't move, and I continue to gaze at him with a bored look on my face.  "You worthless little bitch," he sneers.  "You'll be happy to know that I'm getting transferred and demoted at best, possibly fired.  So if you're really that attached to your old job, you can take it back without worry that you'll have to look at me every day."

"Okay, Sean.  Thanks for the update!" I tell him cheerfully.  "Good luck to you!"  I slip past him and walk back towards Sandra's office.  I don't look back, but I can practically feel his eyes boring holes into my back as I walk away.  It isn't until I turn the corner that my hands start to shake slightly.  I take a deep breath and collect myself before I re-enter Sandra's office.

She smiles politely at me as I sit back down at the table.  I hope I don't look flustered.  "I've fixed the forms," she informs me.  "I'm so sorry about that."

"It's okay," I reply.  "I know how it goes."

She pushes the first form back to me, then goes through the next form, which is the release from liability.  It's identical to what she emailed me, except the dates are filled in.  I read through it again, then nod.  The next form, which probably should have been the first form, is an official notice of resignation.  The wording is changed slightly so that it says it's a "notification of dissolution of employment relationship."  Whatever you need to tell yourself, Sandra.  Then she gives me the last form, which she tells me is a non-disclosure agreement.

"I'm sorry, what?" I ask.

"A non-disclosure agreement is a legal document stating that you won't--"

I interrupt.  "I know what a non-disclosure agreement is," I say, slightly irritated.  "But this is the first I've heard of it.  And why, exactly, are you interested in preventing me from disclosing what happened?"

"We don't want anyone to get unnecessarily riled up or upset," she tells me.  "And I'm sure I mentioned it when I told you about the release."

"You didn't," I say shortly.  I read through the agreement, which lays out very carefully, in great detail, that I cannot tell anyone in the entire world--including the Pope and Jesus and the Queen of England--the details of the dissolution of our employment relationship.  Too bad I've already told several people.  She can't possibly believe that no one knows.  "I'm not signing this," I tell her.  It explains her annoyance at me refusing to sign any of the other paperwork before seeing everything.

"It's a required document," she informs me.  "The rest of the deal is void without it."

"Then I guess the rest of the deal is void," I say.  There is no way I'm signing this document that she tried to sneak in here.  I start to gather my things and put on my coat.  I wasn't planning on suing before, because my need to make a point wasn't that strong.  Now it is.  "I imagine you'll be hearing from my attorney by the end of the week."  This time I'm not bluffing.  I'm already mentally composing a text to Evan to ask him for the contact information for the employment attorney he mentioned.

Sandra lets me get my coat on and get to the door.  I turn before I leave and say, "I ran into Sean when I came out of the bathroom.  We had an interesting chat.  Tell him I said good luck."  Then I put my hand on the knob and turn it.

I barely have the door open an inch when Sandra says, "Wait.  I'm sure we can work something out."  I turn back with one eyebrow raised skeptically.  I wait silently for her to say more.  "There's a chair outside my office," she goes on hurriedly.  "Can you have a seat while I speak to our attorney?"  I nod curtly and exit the office, shutting the door behind me.

As I sit down in the uncomfortable chair outside Sandra's office, I feel a rush of adrenaline.  I shouldn't be getting so much pleasure from this interaction, but I am.  I'm kind of in awe of my ability to negotiate with this powerful woman.  It's awesome.  Maybe I really am in the wrong business.

I wait for just a couple minutes before the door opens and Sandra steps out.  "Come on in, Lauren.  Sorry about that."

I walk in without saying anything and sit back down in my seat at the table.  Sandra sits across from me.  "Will you sign a revised non-disclosure agreement that only restricts you from speaking to the media?"

The media?  Is this woman for real?  I wonder what the fuck is actually going on here.  I pause long enough to make her squirm.  "I'd like to read it," I tell her.  She hands it over and I read through.  True to her word, from what I can tell, this agreement only limits me (or anyone acting under my direction) from speaking to the media regarding the details of the dissolution of our employment relationship.  "I will sign this," I tell her.  I have no desire to talk to the media.  Actually, that's not entirely true.  I had no desire to talk to the media until she told me I can't.  Now I have a very strong desire to do so, but I know I don't want anything to do with the circus that would ensue.

The relief on Sandra's face is clear.  I re-read all the forms to make sure she didn't sneakily try to change anything, then sign, initial, and check the right boxes.  It's well after 5 by the time I leave with my copy of the forms I've signed.

I'm giddy with the excitement of the power I wielded today and I don't even notice Logan until he says my name.  He's leaning against the passenger side of my car.  "I thought this was your car," he  says.  "What are you doing here?"

"Oh, have I got a story for you," I tell him, grinning.  It's a good thing I didn't sign that original non-disclosure agreement.  Still high on my power trip, I start to tell him everything that just went down.