Whose Wedding Are We Talking About?

I hope you guys enjoyed the week of posts!  Tonight's post is a little short because of how it made sense to break things up with the next post.    But I have Liv backstory posts ready to go for the next two weeks, so for the next two weeks there will be three posts.  I'll be posting on Sundays, Wednesdays, and Fridays.  
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When I woke up in the middle of the night, breathing hard from the nightmare I hadn't had in awhile, Brody's body was still pressed against mine.  I could feel his chest rise and fall against my back as he breathed deeply in his sleep.  The regular rhythm lulled me back to sleep and I didn't wake up again until Brody got up to go to the bathroom in the morning.

I was expecting him to go downstairs and work and was surprised when he got back into bed and curled around me again.  "Good morning," he murmured before pressing his lips against my shoulder.
"Good morning," I replied, snuggling back against him.

His fingers ran up and down my forearm as he said, "Last night you said you wanted to marry me."

"I know," I said wryly, "I was there."

Brody laughed, his breath tickling my shoulder.  "I just wanted to make sure I didn't imagine it."

"You didn't," I assured him.

"Can we talk about it some more?" he asked.  I stiffened involuntarily, and he began to stroke my forearm again.  "We don't have to," he said hurriedly.  "Sorry."

I forced my body to relax and said hesitantly, "No, we can.  What do you want to talk about?"

"Just talking hypothetically," he started, his fingers still running gently up and down my forearm, "What kind of wedding would you want?"

I shifted, fidgeting uncomfortably.  "I don't know," I replied.  "I haven't thought about it much."

He slid his fingers down to mine and interlocked them.  "Maybe we can talk about it more later."  He could clearly feel my discomfort and was giving me an out, but I could detect the note of disappointment in his voice.

We laid in silence for several seconds before he said, "What do you want to do this afternoon?"

"Hmmm, can we just hang out here?  Or maybe go out to dinner?"

He kissed my shoulder again and said, "We can do both.  I should get some work done first, okay?"  I nodded and he rolled away from me and got up.

When he had left the bedroom, I curled into a ball and wondered why talking about the future was so hard for me.  Once I was alone, I was able to actually think about his question.  It was still uncomfortable, but not as much.

I finally rolled out of bed and showered and got dressed.  As I walked downstairs, I realized that I had forgotten we were planning on cleaning up from the day before.  I sighed.  So much for Brody helping me clean up.  I resigned myself to just doing it because I didn't want to spend precious moments of our time together this afternoon doing it.

When I walked into the kitchen I saw that all the dishes were washed, dried, and put away.  All the mess from the day before was cleaned up.  I felt simultaneously guilty for assuming he forgot and happy that I didn't have to do it.  I swept the floor and mopped it, taking care of the last traces of yesterday's party.

I was warming up leftovers for lunch when Brody appeared in the kitchen.  He pulled open the fridge and grabbed a soda, and I handed him a plate.  "Thank you," he said, kissing me.

After we sat down, I took a deep breath and said, "I'd want a small wedding, I think.  Not super small, but maybe like 50 people?  I don't think I want something huge and crazy, that sounds like a nightmare to plan and I think I'd only want my closest friends and family to watch me get married."  The words came out in a rush as I pushed pieces of a leftover grilled chicken breast across my plate.  When I finished, I looked up at Brody.

He was watching me carefully and then he nodded.  "I never wanted a huge wedding either," he said casually.

I grinned and added, "Add let's be real, it's not like you have time to help plan a huge wedding, and fuck if whoever you're marrying is doing that alone."

"Wait," he said, holding up both hands in mock confusion.  "You mean men are expected to help plan weddings?  Nobody would actually want my uneducated opinion on flowers, would they?"

"I don't know, you did a pretty good job on the bouquet you sent last week," I replied.  He smiled.  I got quiet again, looking down at my plate.  Then I said, "How do you feel about shorter engagements?"

"I never really saw the point in being engaged for a really long time.  By the time I'd ask someone to marry me, I'm ready.  I don't want to wait around for another two years.  Especially if there's not a giant wedding to plan."

I looked up and smiled.  "And do you have any thoughts about fall?"

"Fall is gorgeous around here, but the weather in the mountains can be unpredictable.  Assuming, of course, that the parties involved wanted to get married in the mountains."

"Well maybe I wouldn't mind snow on my wedding day," I replied.

"Oh, are we talking about your wedding?  I thought we were talking hypothetically," he teased.

I blushed and said, "We're talking about our wedding."

"In that case, fall in the mountains sounds pretty nice," he replied, smiling.  I returned his smile and then focused on my lunch.

After we finished eating, I grabbed our plates and started to wash the dishes.  Brody came up behind me and wrapped his arms around my waist.  He kissed the side of my neck and said, "I can do that."

"I know," I replied, continuing to wash.  "You proved that by washing everything this morning.  Thank you for that, by the way."

"Mmhmm," he responded, his lips back on my neck.

We spent the rest of the afternoon in bed, alternating between napping and...not napping.  We dragged ourselves out of bed to shower together and get ready to go out to dinner.  True to his word, Brody didn't even bother taking his phone with us.

When we got to the restaurant, we sat and and surveyed the tables around us.  "First date," I murmured, motioning subtly to a table behind Brody.  He turned carefully and observed the couple, looking awkward around the room and laughing nervously.

"Definitely," he agreed.  He cocked his head to the left.  "Together for far too long," he said.  I turned my head and nodded when I saw the couple who was paying no attention to each other, each too absorbed in their own smartphone.

"Aww," I said, my gaze landing on a youngish couple holding hands over the table and smiling at each other.  "Young and in love."

Brody grinned.  "If they're young and in love, what are we?" he asked.

"Not quite as young but definitely in love?"

He laughed softly, but our game was interrupted by our server bringing us our drinks.  We enjoyed our dinner and decided to get dessert to go for later, since we were both full.  We took our dessert home and ended up on the couch, doing a whole lot of nothing for the rest of the evening.  And it was perfect.

Monday morning came too soon, and I was slow to wake up.  Brody wasn't in a hurry to get up and moving either, and we ended up riding into town together.  I had successfully avoided Josh for over a week and was starting to hope that maybe he had gotten the hint and was going to leave me alone.  Of course, I had no such luck, and at lunchtime he stuck his head in my office.  "I hear you met my sister," he said casually.

"I did," I replied.

"My brother in law is kind of a douche, isn't he?"

I frowned.  "No, I thought he was fine."

"You must not have spent much time with him then," he replied with a shrug.  "Well, see you later!"  I didn't even have time to process the strangeness of the exchange before he was gone.  I rolled my eyes and returned to eating my lunch.

I skipped the gym after work in favor of hanging out with Lauren.  She invited me over and I picked up takeout on my way.  She had a glass of wine waiting for me, and I happily indulged since Brody was driving me home.

"How'd the cookout go?" she asked, once we were settled.  I filled her in on Valerie's comments and she rolled her eyes.  "She seems lovely," she said sarcastically.

"No kidding," I replied.  "So how have things been since the 'I love you' incident?"

She sighs.  "He says it all the time now.  Like, every day.  It's kind of weird."

I snorted.  "That's what happens after the first time," I replied.  "People just expect you to keep saying it."

"It doesn't even mean anything when you say it all the time!" she complained.

"Do you regret saying it?" I asked, concerned.

"Of course not!" she snapped back.  "Sorry, I didn't mean to snap at you.  I don't regret it.  It's just weird.  This is all brand new to me and I don't know what to make of it."  I reassured her that it would get easier and then she changed the subject.

It was weird to be back in my old house.  It almost looked completely different with Lauren's furniture and decor.  It was also not nearly as clean, but that's my Lauren.  Brody had planned to stay late at work since I was hanging out with Lauren anyway, and it was nearly 9 when he called and asked if I was ready.  He stopped in when he got there and spent a few minutes chatting with Lauren before we went.  He hadn't eaten, so I gave him my leftover Thai takeout and he sat and ate while we all hung out.  I loved having a boyfriend that my friends actually liked.

"So," he said, when we were on our way back home.  "I was looking at flights to Madison today."

"You were?" I asked, confused.

"Are we not going to visit over the 4th of July?"

I had forgotten that we'd talked about that while we were in Mexico.  "Oh yeah, we are, aren't we?"

Brody laughed.  "Anyway, prices are pretty good right now, should we book tickets when we get home?"

"Sure," I replied.

When we got home, we booked tickets and got a rental car.  Now that we had talked weddings, I wondered if his plan was to talk to my parents about proposing to me while we were there.  It would explain why he was so eager to go.  I had mixed feelings about it.  I was simultaneously excited and terrified by the thought of being engaged this summer.   And if we both really did want a short engagement, that meant we'd potentially be married within 6 months.  I was surprised at how much this didn't freak me out.  Don't make me have a conversation about it, of course, but it was relatively safe to think about at this point.

It also made me realize I had been in Denver for almost a year at this point.  That was pretty crazy to me.  It had been a hell of a year--luckily all the amazing things outweighed the bad things, though there had been plenty of bad things, unfortunately.

"Liv?" Brody said, leaning against the bathroom doorframe.

"Huh?"  I realized I'd been standing at the bathroom counter, toothbrush in hand, lost in my own thoughts for several minutes.

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah," I replied.  I nodded to reassure him and then stuck my toothbrush in my mouth.  I brushed my teeth and then when I turned, I saw Brody was still standing in the doorway.

"What were you thinking about?" he asked.

"I've been here for almost a year," I replied.  "That's crazy.  It's gone so fast."

"Wow, you're right," he said thoughtfully.  "I didn't even realize it until you said something.  Are you happy?"

"What?" I asked, confused.

"Happy that you moved here, I mean?"

I laughed.  "That shouldn't even be a question.  It's easily the best decision I've ever made."

He frowned.  "Here I thought that choosing me would be the best decision you've ever made," he teased me.

"Couldn't have done that if I hadn't even moved here," I pointed out.

"Fair point," he conceded.

I grinned.  "You'd better get used to it before you're stuck with it."

He rolled his eyes and nudged me out of the way so he could brush his teeth.  "Keep dreaming," he replied.

We teased each other until we were settled in bed.  I relaxed in Brody's arms as I thought about the past year, and drifted easily to sleep.

Have You Convinced Him?

Brody was up early Saturday morning to get a little work done before getting stuff ready for the cookout we were hosting as a "thank you" to his staff.  I had done most of the grocery shopping earlier in the week and picked up a bunch of beer and wine but we still needed the meat, buns, and some other things.

I started to prep some of the sides while Brody finished up what he was doing, and then he joined me to help like he had promised.  We worked together getting things ready and cleaned up and then Brody asked me if I wanted to stay home and relax for a little while while he went into town and picked up the rest of what we needed.  I decided to go with him and we took off.

We were back with plenty of time for me to shower and get ready while Brody finished up.  I pulled on a sundress and a light cardigan and put on just a little makeup.  I went downstairs to see if there was anything else Brody wanted me to do.  "No," he replied, "but I wouldn't mind if you just kept me company."  He was outside sweeping off the deck and the patio and I gladly sat and watched him work.

He finished up about 45 minutes before we were expecting people and we sat down to enjoy the sunshine while we waited.  Brody (or I guess I should say "we") has an amazing outdoor kitchen on his patio, with a large barbecue, small outdoor fridge, and a sink, along with some other things.  "Want a drink while we wait?" he asked.  He grabbed himself a beer from the little fridge and held up a bottle of wine.  I nodded and he opened it and poured me a glass.

Neil and his wife Valerie were the first to arrive.  I was wary, since Valerie was Josh's sister, but they both seemed nice enough.  We ended up with a pretty good turnout and Brody was busy manning the grill and chatting with his employees.

I was hoping his snotty receptionist, Arlene, wouldn't show up, but she appeared eventually with another woman that Brody introduced as Jennah, from the HR team.  I got the same chilly treatment from Arlene that I had gotten the few times I'd stopped at Brody's office, but I couldn't help but notice how her personality changed when she was speaking directly to Brody.  It was impossible not to notice, since she was following him around like a puppy.

I ran into Brody in the house after a trip to the bathroom.  I didn't see Arlene, and I said, "Looks like you lost your one-woman fan club."  I said it lightly, with a smile, so he knew I was joking.

"I thought you were my one-woman fan club?" he said.

"I'm the official, sanctioned fan club," I replied.  "Arlene is the wannabe fan club."

"Hmmm, you're not jealous, are you?" he asked.

I snorted.  "No," I answered honestly.  "A little annoyed, maybe.  I just think it's rude to blatantly hit on someone when their significant other is around."

"Fair enough.  To be honest, she's annoying me a little too.  Just be nice, and hopefully she'll leave soon."

I frowned.  "I've been nothing but nice," I protested.  "I'm not going to stop now."

"I know," he soothed me.  "Sorry, I didn't mean to suggest otherwise."  He kissed me on the cheek and pulled the fridge open, looking for something.  "I'm almost done grilling," he said when he turned around.  "Have you eaten yet?"  When I shook my head, he said, "Want me to bring you something when I'm finished?  We can eat together."  I agreed and headed back outside with him on my heels.

True to his word, he brought two plates full of food over to the table about 15 minutes later.  He sat down next to Pete, who was sitting there with Valerie, Neil, and someone whose name I couldn't remember.  I looked at my wine glass, which was empty.  I looked over towards the fridge but remembered I had poured the last of the last bottle we had down here when I got this glass.  I stood and looked at Brody.  "I need more wine.  I'll get you another beer while I'm up," I said to him.  I looked around the table.  "Does anyone else need anything?"

Brody stood and pulled out the chair next to him.  "You should sit and eat," he replied.  "I'll get drinks."

"I need to go up to the house to get another bottle of wine anyway," I assured him.

He, smiled, motioned to the chair, and said, "I'll get that too."  Well, I wasn't going to argue with that.  I sat as he went first to the outdoor fridge for his own beer and one for Pete, then up the deck stairs and into the house.

Valerie leaned closed to me and in a hushed tone asked, "Did you convince him yet?"  She wiggled the fingers of her left hand at me while she asked.

"Convince him?" I parroted, confused.

She smiled at me like one might smile at a small child.  "To propose," she whispered.  "You might have a chance at actually enjoying him doing nice things for you while you're married if you hurry up.  Plus, the sooner you get that ring, the sooner you can quit that soul sucking job of yours."  She looked at me expectantly, like she thought I would be so excited about her advice.

"I...like my job," I said slowly, not even wanting to touch the rest of what she said.

She raised her eyebrows.  "You plan to keep working?"  When I nodded, she shook her head.  "Oh sweetie," she replied sadly.  "Men like Brody don't want working wives.  If you want to marry him, you need to accept the lifestyle that goes with it--working is not compatible with that."

I blinked at her and tried to very quickly think of something to say that was 1. appropriate, and 2. would end this conversation quickly.  I couldn't think of anything quickly enough, but luckily Brody returned then with his hands full of drinks.  "Thank you," I said as he sat down.  He smiled and brushed a quick kiss across my cheek.  Under the table, he squeezed my leg briefly before shifting so his thigh rested against mine.  As I pulled my eyes from him and looked across the table to Pete, who was starting to talk, I accidentally made eye contact with Valerie.  She shot me a pointed look before turning her attention to Pete as well.

The rest of the day was uneventful.  Arlene left before it even got dark, which was a relief to me.  Valerie didn't say anything else along the lines of proposals and "the lifestyle" that apparently goes with marrying Brody, and I enjoyed chatting with everyone else.

When we finally said goodbye to the last guests, I walked into the kitchen and frowned at the mess of grilling utensils, leftover food, and glasses.  We got to work right away putting away the leftover food that hadn't already been taken care of.

"Let's clean up the rest tomorrow," Brody said, taking a glass out of my hands and setting it back down on the counter.  "I'm tired, but I'll help you in the morning."

"Okay," I agreed easily.  I turned and leaned against the counter, looking at him thoughtfully.

"What's up?" he asked curiously, cocking an eyebrow.

I had been thinking about what Valerie said, and I was curious.  "If we got married," I started, careful to keep my tone light so he didn't think I was upset (because I wasn't), "would you want me to quit my job?"

He furrowed his brow and looked at me carefully.  "If we got married, do you want to quit your job?" he asked, sounding confused.  When I didn't answer right away, he said, "I feel like this is a trap."

"No, it's not," I assured him.  "I promise.  Right now, at this moment, it doesn't matter what I want.  I just want know what you would want.  It probably won't influence any potential decisions either way, if that helps."

He didn't even pause.  "I want you to do whatever you want to do.  It's not my life to make choices about.  If you wanted to quit your job, I make more than enough money to support us both and would be happy to do it.  If you want to keep working, I think that's great too.  I just want you to be happy."

I nodded, satisfied.  "I knew your answer would be something like that."

"Okay, now you need to tell me why you're asking this," he said pointedly.  "Because it didn't seem like a casual inquiry."

I explained my one-sided conversation with Valerie, being careful to assure him that I wasn't worried that he would propose and then demand I quit my job, but that I was more just curious what he would really want.  I told him I was pretty sure he probably didn't care either way, but that she got me thinking about it, so I wanted to know.

"Ahh," Brody said, understanding.  He leaned against the counter and looked thoughtful.  "You know, my mom didn't work.  And it will probably not surprise you that that was my dad's doing.  She was far easier to control when she had no income, few social supports, and didn't really have her own identity.  My mom now is a completely different person than she was when she was married to him.  I know that you'd still find a way to be independent, be social, and be involved in your own things if you chose to not work--but it would have to be your choice.  I don't ever want to be responsible for turning someone into a shell of a person that can't even decide what groceries to buy without permission."

I frowned.  "That sounds awful," I said.

"My mom was much happier without him," Brody agreed.

"Thanks for talking about this with me," I said gratefully.

Brody smiled and reached out, grabbing my hand and pulling me over to him.  "I'm glad you asked," he said.  "I like having these conversations a lot better than the ones where you assume or overanalyze and don't say anything until you're already upset."

"I'm working on it," I said, sliding my arms around his waist and leaning against him.  He wrapped his arms tightly around my back and kissed the top of my head.

"Anything else?" he asked.  His hand had found its way to my neck and his thumb was working gently against the muscles there.  I relaxed against him further and shook my head.  "Are you ready to go to bed?"  I nodded, but didn't move, letting him continue to rub my neck.  Finally I pulled away and we headed upstairs.

When we were settled in bed, Brody said, "I have a question for you."

"Okay," I replied, shifting to get a little more comfortable.

"You asked me if we got married, if I would want you to quit your job," he said.  I nodded in the dark.  "So does that mean you've thought about us getting married?"

My stomach twisted itself into a knot, but the darkness of the room was soothing to my nerves.  "I have," I replied finally.  "Have you?"

Brody laughed softly.  "I wouldn't have asked you to move in if I didn't want to marry you, Liv.  I also assume you wouldn't have moved in if you didn't want to marry me, but since you brought it up, I thought I'd confirm it."

"I didn't say I wanted to," I teased him.  "I said I've thought about it."

"If you're willing to joke about it, I'll take that as a positive sign," he replied.  "At least you're not running for the door."

"I don't have anywhere else to go this time," I bantered back.

"Touché," Brody replied.

I turned over to face him.  "But," I said softly, taking a deep breath, "I do want to marry you."

Brody didn't say anything, just kissed me.  He readjusted his arms around me and pulled me against him, then ran his hands down my back, over my hips, down my legs, and back up to my waist.  As his kiss grew more urgent, I hooked my leg over his and pressed my hips to his.  He pushed my leg down long enough to slide my shorts over my hips and down my legs.  I kicked them off as I pulled his down.  He drew my leg back up and over his hip and eased into me.  Still laying on our sides, facing each other, the angle kept things slow.  My back arched and gave him access to my neck, which he pressed his lips to as I came, my leg tightening around his.  He followed not long after, and we laid there, still tangled together, catching our breath.

Brody kissed me, then said, "You're absolutely beautiful, kind, brilliant, funny, and strong willed and I'm lucky that you're in my life."

"Strong willed is a good thing?" I asked, laughing softly.

He pressed his forehead against mine.  "It is on you," he replied.

I grinned in the dark and said, "Well, you're easily the hottest guy in at least the entire state of Colorado, if not the U.S.  Probably the world."  He laughed and shook his head.  I took a deep breath and continued, "But you're also driven, smart, and generous.  You always seem to know what I need, even when I don't, and you give it to me without a second thought.  You're loyal as hell and committed to the things that are important to you.  And I can't believe I'm one of them."  Once I started, the uncomfortable feeling decreased, and it became easier to say all the things I should have been telling Brody every day, but hadn't because it was hard for me.

"Well, holy shit," he said lightly.  "Who are you, and what have you done with my girlfriend, who is usually terrified of her own feelings?"  I was glad he had made a joke, because I didn't think I could handle being serious for much longer.

"Alien abduction, probably," I said, smiling against his lips as he pressed them against mine.  We hadn't moved and I felt him hardening again inside me.  He surprised me by rolling both of us over and pinning my hands above my head.  I moaned softly as he thrust hard against me.  I was soon dying to touch him, to run my hands over his smooth, taut muscles.  Several seconds later he released my hands, and my fingers went instantly for his arms.  I ran them from elbow to shoulder, then down his chest.  I had just slipped them around to stroke his back when he slid an arm under my back and propped my hips up off the bed.  The sudden change in angle and sensation sent me over the edge and I dug my nails into his back as I arched up further against him.  He groaned and came, dropping his head down onto my shoulder and tensing above me.

"Jesus," Brody muttered, his breath tickling my collarbone.  I tilted my head towards his, my jaw resting against his temple.

"I love you," I said to him softly.

He raised his head and kissed me.  "I love you, Liv," he replied.  "Alien abduction or not."

(Then) Liv: Connections

“What about that one?” Amy asked, motioning to a lanky blonde guy sitting in the corner with two other guys and a girl.

I wrinkled my nose.  “No.”  Lynn and Amy were determined to get me a date tonight, mostly so I’d stop complaining about how long it’d been since I had gone on a decent date.  There had been a lot of really bad dates lately.   

Lynn laughed.  “He’s not her type.  You’re looking at the wrong guys.”

“Hey!” I said indignantly.  “I don’t have a type.”

Lynn cocked an eyebrow at me and said, “I bet I can pick out—“ she took a quick look around, then continued, “at least 5 men in here that you find attractive.”

“You’re on.  Drinks are on you if you’re wrong.”

She smirked.  “And drinks are on you if I’m right.  And you have to be honest, no cheating.” 

“As if I would stoop so low,” I retorted.  “Go.”

Lynn looked around the bar slowly and then said, “That one.”  She was pointing at a dark haired guy sitting near the door.  He had on a button down shirt and looked like he was tall and built. 

“Yes,” I admitted.

Lynn grinned.  “That one, that one, that one, annnnddd….that one!” she said, pointing out 4 guys in rapid succession.  Looking at them, I was forced to admit that she was right about all of them.

“But,” I protested, “Anyone with a pulse would find all of those guys attractive.”

Amy laughed.  “Anyone with a pulse who happens to also have a thing for tall pretty boys with dark hair and arms the size of your head.  Bonus points for dark, brooding eyes.”

I had to grudgingly admit that all the guys that Lynn had pointed out did have some similarities.  “But their arms don’t have to be the size of my head,” I argued.  “Just bigger than mine.  Maybe bigger than both of mine put together.”

Lynn grinned.  “I think I’ll be having another drink soon,” she said, looking down at her glass, then lifting her eyebrows at me.  We were celebrating Amy’s graduation, and we were waiting for some of our other friends to arrive.  Amy had had to take a semester off because of a bad bout of mono that landed her in the hospital for 3 weeks, and then her next semester was rough, so she ended up graduating the year after us.   But she was finally done, and we were celebrating. 

“Where is everyone?” Amy asked, looking at her phone.  We’d arranged to meet a little earlier than the planned time, but it was now after the time everyone else was supposed to meet us here.

“I don’t know,” I replied, “But if you guys want more drinks, I’m going up to the bar now.”  I took their requests and headed to the bar.  It was crowded with graduation celebrators, and I had to squeeze through people to get close to the bar.  I waited for several minutes for our drinks, then walked back to the table with the three drinks in my hand.  By the time I got there, there were a bunch of people around the table we’d been occupying and I realized the rest of our group had arrived.

“Where's my drink?” came a teasing voice, as I set Lynn and Amy’s drinks in front of them.  I looked up at Adam, one of our friends and the person that Lynn had had an unrequited crush on forever.

“Liv lost a bet,” Lynn said, smirking at me.

“Oh really?” Adam asked, laughing.  “What was the bet?”

“It doesn’t matter,” I replied.  “I lost.”

“Oh no, you don’t get to do that!” Adam exclaimed.  “I want to know.”

Amy broke in.  “Liv tried to insist that she didn’t have a ‘type’ and Lynn bet Liv she could pick out 5 guys Liv thought was hot.  Liv took the bet, and, well…” she motioned to the drinks.

Adam laughed loudly and turned to me.  “That was stupid, Liv.  Anyone could have beat you at that bet,” he said. 

“What?  No!” I yelped.  “It’s not that obvious, is it?”

“Oh yes,” Adam argued.  “Tall, dark, and handsome will get him at least conversation with you.  If he has at least half a brain in his head and some manners to go with, he’ll get a date.  And if he looks like he just stepped out of a Ralph Lauren catalog, your panties might as well have stayed at home for as long as you’ll have them on.”

My face got hot and I shook my head, while Lynn and Amy roared with laughter.  “It’s true,” Lynn gasped.  “Oh, it’s so true.  Don’t shake your head like he’s not spot on.”

“You all know I don't do casual sex, which is exactly what his comment about my panties implied!" I protested.  Adam was trying to stop laughing, but when I said that, he laughed harder.  "You are a terrible person,” I said to Adam, fighting the urge to start laughing with them.  “Actually, all of you are terrible people.  I don’t know why I hang out with you.”

“Because you love us dearly and we know you so well,” Amy suggested. 

"Because we all know what kind of man to point your way?" Adam tried.  Lynn just laughed.

I glared at them until Amy changed the subject.  Adam turned to talk to someone else and Lynn stuck with him, so Amy nudged me.  “Speaking of tall, dark, and handsome,” she hissed, “John's here."  I rolled my eyes.  Lynn constantly teased me that John was exactly my type and had been right under my nose for years.

"Oh," I said, following her gaze.  "He came with Paul and Erin.  Let's go say hi."  

We walked over and greeted them.  “Hey guys, thanks for coming!” Amy chirped brightly, hugging each of them.   Amy was then quickly distracted by our friend Kate, and she took off to say hi.

"Hey stranger," John greeted me, smiling.

I hugged him.  "It hasn't been that long."

"Since your birthday," he replied.  "Four months."

I frowned.  "Wow, I guess you're right.  I've been so busy."

Before we could go any further than that, we were interrupted by Kate and Amy coming back over.  Amy clearly had a solid start on a good buzz, and she was shrieking with laughter about something Kate had said.  John leaned against the table behind us, his arm casually resting against my back, and we exchanged amused glances.

I heard Lynn call my name from the other table, so I walked over.  "When are you going to make a move on that?"

"Right, because making a move is sooooo like me," I replied, rolling my eyes.

"No, it's not at all like you, and that's the point!  I'm starting to think I was going to have to have the 'lower your standards, you stuck up bitch' talk with you soon, since you've found something wrong with nearly every guy that's looked at you for the last four years.  That guy," she motioned in the general direction of John and Paul and Erin, "Is totally your type, he's smart, he's got a job, and you already know each other.  You need to make that happen, you might not get another chance."

I frowned.  "Normally if I want a reality check, I go to Lauren.  Glad you can fill in in her absence," I said sarcastically.  

"Liv, sweetheart, I love you, you know that.  But it's been one bad first date after another, for years.  And some of them were really bad, I will give you that.  But sometimes it seemed like you were just looking for reasons to not see them again."

"What's the point in seeing them again if there's no connection?" I asked with a shrug.

"This isn't the movies," Lynn said.  "Connections don't always happen on a first date.  Sometimes you have to give things a chance.  Not everyone is going to be Colin."

I had been staring over her shoulder, but my eyes snapped to hers when she said that.  "Don't," I warned her.  "Please," I added, softening my tone.  

"Okay, I won't," she said.  "But think about it.  Do something crazy.  Don't stay stuck there."

"I'm not," I protested.  

Lynn started to respond, but Erin hurried over and said, "Amy is trying to challenge a stranger to a Prairie Fire drinking competition, help!" 

"Oh no," Lynn and I said in unison.  Amy prided herself on her ability to drink the tequila and hot sauce shots, but a competition sounded like a really bad choice.  Lynn and I hurried after Erin to intervene, and I tried to stop thinking about Colin.

Fucking Colin.  I had spent the entirety of my freshman year lusting after him from afar.  He was in one of my classes, lived one floor above me...and was dating one of my suite-mates.  I was head over heels, and there wasn't a thing I could do about it.  So I went about my life, even doing a little dating here and there, but I just couldn't shake it.  Of course, I wasn't even the slightest bit to come back from summer break to find out that they had broken up over the summer.  He ended up in another one of my classes, and we ran into each other one day after.  We ended up going to get lunch together and spending the rest of the afternoon together.  We did the same thing the next week.  And the week after that.  And finally, he asked me out on an actual date.  

The date was amazing, and when he kissed me, it was absolutely perfect.  It was exciting, there was chemistry.  We went out again, and I slept with him after that date.   And it was amazing.  And then?  Well, then he never called me again.  He started sitting on the opposite side of the lecture hall, and leaving right after class.  And when I ran into him once at the fitness center, he awkwardly said hi and tried to get away.  When I asked him what happened, he shrugged, said, "It was fun.  But that was it, you know?  Fun."  

I was pissed, but I was less upset that I expected to be.  But after that, every single person got compared to Colin.  It wasn't fair, but that's what happened.  Lynn and Amy thought that I was still infatuated with him.  As many times I tried to assure them that that wasn't it like my 3 week fling had broken my heart forever, they just didn't get it.  I got over him pretty quickly, considering, but I couldn't get them to understand that I was craving the connection that Colin and I had, for those few short weeks.  The sparks.  The fireworks.  It got to be such a sore subject that I refused to even talk to them about it.  But in any case, here I am, 4 years later, still chasing a connection.  

I shook the thoughts out of my head as Lynn encouraged the random person to step away from the challenge, and I tried to distract Amy.  She was hell bent on her shot competition, and I finally said, "You can still have your competition.  What if we just do them?  And whoever keeps the straightest face wins."  Have you tried to keep a straight face while drinking a shot of tequila mixed with hot sauce?  Right.  

"I'll buy and judge," John said.  At some point he had appeared next to me.  "Because this is something I've got to see."  He walked up to the bar before I could protest.

"Fine, since Lynn chased my competitor away," Amy said, pouting.  But then she got excited.  "I'm going to kick your ass!"

Lynn glared at me.  "Did you really just volunteer us for this?" she hissed under her breath.  

"Drink up, princess," I replied, smiling.

John returned with three shot glasses.  He set one down in front of Amy, one in front of me, and one in front of Lynn.  Amy was still talking to someone and he leaned close to Lynn and I and said, "Yours are just tequila.  But she's going to win, so she doesn't demand a rematch."  I threw a grateful look over my shoulder at him.  

When Amy returned her attention to us, we all downed our shots, and John declared Amy the winner.  I was a little worried she'd challenge someone else anyway, but she quickly became distracted by Erin and Kate and started talking to them.  Lynn and I turned to John, and I said, "Thank you.  Whoever introduced her to those shots should be punched in the face."  

He laughed and leaned against the table next to me.  His leg brushed against mine and neither of us moved to end the contact.  "I'm glad I could help."  

Adam wandered over and we all got back to our normal mixing and talking.  Every once in awhile I'd catch John looking at me.  When I walked past him to go to the bathroom, I let my shoulder brush his arm.  I fought the urge to turn to see if he was watching me.  When I came back, he caught my arm gently as I walked by.  I turned and looked at him curiously.  "It's getting close to last call, and a bunch of our group just left.  How are you ladies getting home?"

"We walked," I replied.  We only lived a couple blocks away, and John didn't live much further.

"I don't think Amy is going to be doing much walking," John said, frowning.  I followed his gaze to where Amy was sitting on a high bar chair, leaning against Adam, who was standing next to her with an arm around her.  Her eyes were open but I agreed, especially in the 4 inch heels she was wearing.  

"Shit," I muttered.  I tried to figure out a better solution, and watched as Erin walked over and said something to Adam.  Amy pulled herself into an upright position and shook her head and Erin said something to her too.  Amy shook her head again, and looked like she was arguing with Amy.  I walked over there.  

"You're not walking home, babe," Erin was saying.  "You're absolutely shit faced. I'll give you a ride."

"I'm not that drunk.  And who's gonna walk with Liv and Lynn?" Amy slurred.  

"I will," John volunteered from behind me.  

I turned to protest that Lynn and I would be fine on our own, but Amy interrupted.  "Do it," she said excitedly.  "Because remember how we talked about your type? And he's your type!  You should let him walk you alllllllll the way home."  I felt my face immediately flush and had to restrain myself from slapping a hand over Amy's mouth so she didn't say anything else.  

I fought my embarrassment long enough to say, "I will if you let Erin drive you." 

"Deal," she said, sticking out her hand to shake.  It threw off her balance and she started to tipping towards me.  Adam quickly wrapped his arm back around her and pulled her upright again.  I shook her hand and turned, cheeks still warm.   

"Let's find Lynn," I said hurriedly.

"She's right there," John replied, pointing to our right.  He was smirking, but didn't say anything.  I turned and saw Lynn talking to Kate just a few feet away from us.  

We walked over and collected Lynn.  I explained that Erin was taking Amy home and John was going to walk with us.  Lynn nodded knowingly and winked me behind John's back.  "Do something crazy!" she mouthed silently.  I shook my head and rolled my eyes.  John turned back to see if we were coming and we both pasted innocent smiles onto our faces.  Nothing suspicious about that.

Lynn lived the closest, and we were dropping her off at her building within minutes.  "I'm two more blocks," I said, suddenly feeling shy now that I was alone with John--which was stupid, because I'd known him for years.  We were walking close enough to each other that our arms occasionally brushed.  I got a slight thrill every time it happened.  The power of suggestion, perhaps? We were quieter now, chatting a little about things that had happened while we were out.  When we got to my building, which was above a 24 hour coffee shop and cafe, he said suddenly, "Are you hungry?"

I raised an eyebrow at him.  "Do you know me at all?"

He didn't say anything else, just pulled the door to the cafe open.  I walked inside and he followed, and we sat at a booth in the corner.  The place was almost deserted, there were two girls sitting in the opposite corner.  I knew they'd get busier when the bars closed in about a half hour.

Once we had ordered, John looked at me and smiled.  "So what's this I hear about being your type? Is it true?"

My cheeks, once again, flushed and I fought the urge to sink lower in my seat.  I opened my mouth to deny it, because that seemed like the best way to end my embarrassment, but I decided against it.  Do something crazy, right?  "Yeah," I said.  "It's true."

We ate our greasy 24-hour cafe food and chatted more about the evening and what we'd each been up to in the last 4 months.  When we finished, he paid, despite my protests, and walked me back to the entrance to the apartments above.  "Can I walk you up?" he asked.  I raised one eyebrow, skeptical of his intentions.  He laughed and held up both hands.  "I just want to walk you up.  You never know what could happen in these sketchy apartment stairwells.  I promise I'll behave."  

"Okay," I agreed.  I unlocked the door and we went in.  We walked up the stairs, quiet now.  It was late, and I was really tired.  When we got to my door I stopped and turned to him.  "Thanks for walking me home," I said at the same time he said, "I had fun tonight."  We looked at each other and laughed.  And then I kissed him.  Yep.  I kissed him.  Not a signature move of mine, that's for sure.  

And you know what?  It was there.  The connection, the sparks, the fireworks.  Enough that I was breathless when we pulled apart.  We just looked at each other for a second, and then he kissed me again.  He pushed his hands into my hair and backed me up against the door to my apartment.  When we finally separated again, he said, "I'm sorry, I promised to behave, and I didn't."

I laughed.  "I started it, blame it on me."  

"You're too pretty to take the blame," he replied softly.  "So should I get back on my best behavior, or would you like me to break that promise again?"

"I think you'd better break that promise again."

(Now) Brody: Appreciation

I pushed open the door to the small jewelry shop in Colorado Springs and paused for a second, taking in the familiar sights.  I was missing a lot of work time to come here, but my mom has known the owner forever and I don't think I'll ever feel right about buying jewelry anywhere else.

I was greeted cheerfully by an attractive woman who was probably in her early 30s.  She was the type of woman that I would have turned on the charm for a year ago.  But now?  Nah.  I was glad it wouldn't be painful to look at her, but other than that, I just hoped she knew her diamonds.

She started to ask me what she could help me with, but was interrupted.  "Brody?  Brody Adler?  It's about time you stopped in here!"  Don's booming voice carried across the store, empty of customers except for me.

"Hi, Don," I greeted him.

"Don't you 'hi, Don' me, young man.  Get over here and give me a hug!  I haven't even seen your mother in ages, how is she?"  I laughed and walked towards him, obliging him.

"She's hanging in there," I replied, once we had separated from our brief man-hug.  "Doing pretty well, actually.  I'm going to take her out for lunch after I'm done here."

"Good.  You tell her to come visit me.  What can I do for you?  Surely you don't need one of those?"  He motioned to the engagement rings I was peering at through the glass.

I chuckled.  "Not quite yet," I said.  "Soon, maybe.  Today I just need...something.  I'm not exactly sure what I'm looking for."

"Uh oh, sounds like you're in trouble," he said knowingly.  "What did you do?"

I smiled.  "No, not today.  This is a 'just because' gift."

"Always a good choice.  Necklace?  Earrings?  Diamonds?  Something else?"

"I...don't know," I said.  I really didn't have much of a plan.  "A necklace, maybe.  Diamonds, definitely."

He nodded and put a hand on my shoulder, guiding me towards a display case a few down from where I was still absently gazing at engagement rings.  "Have a price point in mind?"

I looked through the glass of the case at the necklaces.  "No," I replied.

"No?" he asked, surprised.

"No," I repeated.  "I'll spend whatever I need to on the right piece."

"Well, I'd be remiss to argue with that.  Tell me about the lucky lady," Don said, watching me as I slowly walked the length of the display case, looking at what he had.  "I bet she's pretty.  In fact, she must be something really special if you're here."  This was the first time I'd ever come to see Don with intentions of buying jewelry for anyone but my mother.

I looked up and him and grinned.  "She's absolutely gorgeous, Don.  I'm the lucky one.  She's a therapist--she works with a lot of teenagers.  I don't know how she does it.  I can't stand teenagers."  Don laughed.  "She's brilliant and intuitive and funny.  She's also crazy stubborn and hot-tempered, but I love it most of the time.  She's a tiny little firecracker."

Don nodded, listening.  "What do you think about this one?" he asked, pulling a necklace from the display case.  He laid it on the counter in front of me.

I ran my finger along the white gold chain and shook my head.  "It's beautiful, but it's not her," I said.  It was too flashy for Liv's tastes.   It was something I'd probably buy for someone I wasn't as in tune with, for someone whose tastes and preferences I hadn't bothered to get to know.  He nodded and put it back.   Don waited patiently as I walked back and forth, pausing when I saw something that caught my eye.  Finally I said, "That one.  Middle row, third from the right."

Don pulled out the necklace and laid it on the counter.  I picked it up and inspected it carefully.  It was rose gold, with a reasonably sized, simple pendant.  The pendant had pave-set diamonds around it, and there were two larger diamonds and a pearl nestled within the pendant.  "Yes," I said.  "This is it."  I didn't even bother looking at the price tag.  It didn't matter.

Don grinned.  "Excellent choice.  That one is a custom design that was made just for my shop.  You won't find a duplicate anywhere.  Do you want to look at anything else?"  I shook my head.  I didn't need to stand here and agonize all day.  This was the one.  He took it back and motioned to the lady that had greeted me originally, who was now cleaning the display case glass.  She got to work getting a box while Don walked over to the register tucked back in the corner.  He hit a few buttons then told me the total.  I didn't even blink as I handed over my JP Morgan Palladium card.

Don's employee appeared next to me with my purchase, beautifully gift wrapped.  "Thank you," I said graciously.  She smiled and disappeared.

"Well, son," Don said, clapping me on the back as we walked towards the door.  "I hope she loves it.  If she doesn't, bring her here to pick something else.  I'd love to meet her anyway."

"She'll love it," I said confidently.  I said goodbye to Don and walked to my car.  I called my mom and let her know I was on my way to get her.  When I arrived at her house, she walked outside before I could even put my car in park.

I parked quickly and jumped out so I could open the passenger side door.  She hugged me tightly and kissed my cheek before climbing in.  Once we were headed back towards town, she said, "I could have met you in town, you know."

"I know," I replied.

"You haven't even told me why you were in town.  And on a work day, no less."

"I was paying Don a visit," I said.

"Don?" my mom asked.  "Brody, did you buy...?"  She trailed off, looking at me to confirm or deny.

I chuckled.  "A ring?  No.  Just a necklace."

Out of the corner of my eye, I saw disappointment flash across my mom's face before she arranged it back into a neutral expression.  "Maybe someday I'll get some grandchildren," she said wistfully, gazing out the window.

I rolled my eyes and almost laughed at her abnormally dramatic (and not terribly believable) statement.  "You know we don't have to be married to make that happen, right?"

She glared at me, a rare look from my placid, good natured mother.  I tried to keep the smirk off my face but failed.  "You do want to marry her, don't you?" she asked.

"Yes, mom.  I absolutely want to marry her.  But I'm pretty sure she's not ready, and I'm not interested in rushing her.  I learned the hard way not to rush her."  My jaw flexed involuntarily as I thought of the night I proposed her moving in with me.  That was not an experience I wished to repeat any time soon.

"Hmmm," my mom said.

Taking her cue, I rambled on.  "I think she's almost ready though.  I really do.  I think Mexico helped."

"So you had a nice time?"

"Yes," I replied.  "It was really great.  Perfect, actually.  I wish we were still there."

"Then why are you making that face?" my mom asked pointedly.  I glanced at her and saw her face screwed up in a frown, impersonating my own impression.

I snorted.  "I was just thinking about how much work I'd have waiting for me when I get back from this little excursion."

Now my mom frowned for real.  "You can't do this forever," she said.

"I don't want to do it forever," I replied.

Either she didn't hear me or she didn't believe me, and she continued.  "You work way too much.  It's not good for you, and I can't imagine it's good for your relationship."  I nodded, agreeing.  "It was fine when you were young and single but you need to start thinking about where you want your priorities to lie going forward."

"Mom, I know," I said.  She gave me a skeptical look.  "I do," I insisted.  "I can't just work less, it doesn't work that way.  I have to make big changes to get there.  But I'm not taking new clients, I have someone actively recruiting staff, and I'm grooming Pete to be able to some day step into the role of managing all the day-to-day stuff.  I don't want to get completely out of the day-to-day, but I do want to be mostly focused on bringing in new clients and our relationships with other agencies and professionals--attorneys, agents, the media.  That's what I like the most, it's what I'm best at, and I can make that happen on a much more reasonable schedule.  I don't want to be at the office until 9 and then working from home until all hours of the night.  Someday I want a family, and I want to be actually present in their lives."  I left, "unlike my dad" unspoken, but the words still hung heavy in the air between my mom and I.

My mom didn't say anything for several seconds and then she nodded.  "Does Olivia know all that?"

I shrugged.  "Kind of, I guess.  I mean, she knows my goal is to not always work this much.  And she's seen me make big changes to the way I do things to improve our relationship.  She knows I'm not taking new clients, but I guess I haven't really told her the rest.  I feel like I make so many 'it won't always be like this' promises that I need to be careful of how often I'm doing that, because I don't want the words to end up feeling empty."

I thought my mom would lecture me on communicating, but instead she just said, "You've worked really hard to get to where you are, and I'm proud of you."

"Thanks, Mom," I replied.

My mom dropped the marriage/grandchildren/working too much conversation and we had a nice lunch.  Towards the end, when she made the third off-hand comment about "a friend", I finally put it all together.  "Mom, are you...dating someone?" I asked in surprise.

She studied my face carefully before giving a curt nod and saying, "Yes, I guess you could call it that."

I grinned broadly.  As far as I knew, my mom hadn't dated anyone even semi-seriously since she and my dad had separated, so many years ago.  She was trying to play this off like it wasn't a big deal, but I could see the smile tugging at the corners of her lips.  "Mom, that's great!" I said happily.  "I'm happy for you."  I was curious who he was, how she'd met him, how long, but I knew if she wanted me to know those things, she'd tell me.

"Thank you," she replied.  Her cheeks were rosy, which was as close as her olive toned skin got to blushing.  "He's a bit younger than me, but he's a very wonderful man."  Then she promptly changed the subject and I knew that would be all I got from her now.

We finished our lunch and I brought her back home, then got started on my way back to Denver.  While I drove, I called Jen.  I didn't know if she'd be done with work or not, but I figured I'd try.  "Hello, my dearest brother who is so good at staying in touch," Jen said sarcastically when she picked up.  "I feel like it was just yesterday when we last talked."

"Hi Jen," I replied, ignoring her dig.  It had been awhile.  I'd like to think we'd spoken since we were both in Miami after dad died, but aside from a few texts, I guess we probably hadn't.  "How are you?"

"I'm pretty good," she replied, softening.  "I had today off, so I don't have much to complain about.  How about you?"

"I'm good," I replied.  "I just had lunch with mom.  And Liv and I went to Mexico a couple weeks ago, so I don't have much to complain about either."

"Yeah, Mom told me you guys were going to Mexico.  How was it?"

I filled her in and we talked about random things for awhile.  Then I said, "Did you know Mom is dating someone?"

Jen laughed.  "I did, actually.  Or rather, I had a suspicion.  She never quite came out and said it, and I didn't ask, but it sure sounded like she was dating him."

"Why didn't you tell me?" I asked indignantly.

"It was hers to tell, not mine," Jen responded reasonably.  "And anyway, maybe if you called me, I would have."

"Hey," I protested, not willing to get raked over the coals for something that was a two-way street.  "The phone works both ways."

"Fair point," she replied.  "We've both been really busy, I guess.  I've been traveling a lot for work."

"Are you seeing anyone?" I asked.  "Now I feel like this is a question I have to start asking everyone when I haven't talked to them in awhile."

Jen snorted.  "No.  I was, for a little while, but it wasn't very serious and it didn't really work out.  Actually, he ended up being a huge asshole."

"Sorry, Jen.  Want me to fly out and kick his ass?"

She laughed.  "No, but at least you're asking now, and not just threatening boys on the playground when they so much as looked at me."

"Someone had to watch out for you," I replied indignantly.  "None of those boys had honorable intentions."  I could almost hear the sound of her eyes rolling.

Jen and I talked almost my entire drive back to Denver.  It felt good to catch up with her.  At the end, she suggested that Liv and I come out and visit sometime.  I agreed and promised to talk to Liv about it.  The best part was that she didn't lecture me about working too much, and she didn't mention marriage or babies or rings.

I took a quick detour into town.  I'd decided to pick up some things for dinner.  Liv was a great cook, and had been making sure that there was always something to eat when I got home.  If I had been at work late enough that I just ate there (if I remembered to), then I'd take it for lunch the next day.  She'd usually eaten already by the time I got home, but she'd always sit with me while I ate.  I always thanked her and tried to show her how grateful I was, but I was worried that she'd soon start to feel like she'd moved in to do all the work around the house, and I didn't want that. The couple times I'd been done with work early enough to have a chance at eating with her, I'd picked something up so she didn't have to cook, but it wasn't quite the same.  I wanted to sit down and eat with her tonight, and I wanted to cook.

After a quick perusal of my favorite grocery store's meat counter, I picked two New York strips, then grabbed some stuff for a salad and some potatoes.  Outside of breakfast and the basics, I had a pretty limited repertoire of things I made well, and steak was one of them.  Luckily, Liv loves steak as much as I did, so she doesn't seem to mind.

When I got home, I had a couple hours to work before I needed to get dinner started.  On Fridays, Liv's last client usually left at 5, then she'd stay to finish up her paperwork and she was usually home around 6.  So I figured I had about 2 hours before I needed to get the grill on and get the potatoes on, and I could do a little more work while those cooked before I needed to put the steaks on.  I didn't even bother opening my email, because I knew it would just distract me from the more urgent things I needed to get done.  When I got a text from Liv that said, "Stopping at the grocery store, anything you want me to grab?" I only responded, "Thanks, but I'm good.  I'll see you at a reasonable time tonight :)"  I didn't want to ruin the surprise too much.

Her stop at the store bought me an extra 30-45 minutes, and I managed to finish all the things on my to-do list that would have otherwise gotten me out of bed at 2am to finish before I could get some real sleep.  I was relieved, because now I could enjoy my evening with Liv more freely.

I'd just put the steaks on when I heard the garage door opening.  Excellent timing.  Liv walked into the kitchen, where I was opening a bottle of wine, and smiled.  "What are you doing home already?" she asked, looking surprised.  "When you said 'reasonable time' I figured you meant around 8 instead of 9."

"I was already here when I sent that," I said, returning her smile.  I reached out and grabbed her hand, pulling her close enough to kiss.  "I just wanted to show you how much I appreciate everything you've been doing lately.  This doesn't come anywhere near close to making up for all the work you've done around here, and your patience with my schedule, but I just want you to know that I notice it and I'm grateful."

"I don't expect you to make up for anything," she replied, "but I do love coming home and getting to spend time with you, especially when it means I don't have to cook."

I kissed her again and handed her a glass of wine.  We went out onto the deck and I flipped the steaks, then we both sat with our wine and talked about our days.  Or, she talked about her day.  I talked about some of the work I'd done.  I'd fill her in on the rest later.

A few minutes later, the steaks were done and I set them on a plate to rest while I got the potatoes off the grill and brought the salad out.  Liv started to get up to help but I shook my head and told her the only thing she was doing tonight was enjoying her wine and her steak.  And not to brag, but I cooked the steaks perfectly.

We took our time eating and finishing our wine.  When we were done, I grabbed Liv's plates plus the other random utensils and dishes scattered around before she could.  I took them into the kitchen and put everything on the counter, then turned to her.  "Don't even think about doing anything with these," I instructed her.  "I'm going to wash them tomorrow, because I'd rather spend the rest of the evening with you, and doing them now will take away from that."

She held up her hands and smirked.  "No problem, I won't touch them.  It'll be hard, but I think I can manage.  You know how much I love to do dishes."

I laughed at her sarcasm and wrapped an arm around her waist.  "I appreciate your commitment to avoiding your favorite things for me," I replied.  I kissed her, letting my hands drift from her waist over her hips then up her back.  She pressed her hips against me and gripped my shirt tightly in her fist, and I pulled away before we got too carried away.  "Hold on," I said.

"Why?" she asked, pouting.  She ran her hands down my chest and stomach and paused at my belt.  It took all my willpower to take a small step away.  She looked puzzled.

"Because, you need to open this first," I replied, pulling the gift wrapped box out of my pocket, where it had been since I left Don's store.

She looked at the box, then back up at me.  "What is it?" she asked curiously.

I smiled. "If I tell you, that kind of defeats the purpose of it being wrapped," I teased her gently.  I held it out to her.  She took it tentatively, as if scared it was going to burn her.

She looked up at me again, the puzzled look still on her face.  "Did I forget some occasion?" she asked, worriedly.  "Because I do that shit all the time."

"No," I said laughing.  "Just open it, would you?  It's not going to hurt you."  I pulled out a chair from the dining room table and motioned for her to sit.  Then I sat next to her.

She tugged at the ribbon, a little squished from being in my pocket for so long.  She got it off and slowly unwrapped the paper.  She set the paper aside carefully and lifted the top off the box inside, then sucked in a sharp breath.  "Oh," she said softly, looking at the necklace.  She ran her finger along the chain, then looked up at me.  "Brody, it's gorgeous.  Thank you."  She still looked puzzled and then she said, "I love it, it's amazing.  Please don't take this the wrong way, but...why?"

"Why not?" I asked, echoing the words from the card with her flowers from last week.  That didn't seem to stifle her curiosity.  I took the box from her hands and took the necklace out.  I motioned for her to turn and she did, pulling her hair out of the way so I could put the necklace on her.  "Because I love you.  Because I appreciate your patience.  Despite the changes I've made in my work schedule, I'm well aware that there are more that need to happen in order for things to be ideal.  And you've changed your expectations and been a lot more flexible with my schedule and I'm grateful."

I paused as she turned back around to face me.  "But, there is one thing that this is not, and I want that to be really clear."  She furrowed her brow and waited for me to continue.  "This is not an attempt to compensate for the lack of time I've been spending with you the past couple weeks.  It's not an apology or a bribe to keep you happy about something you shouldn't be happy about.  It's just a tangible way I can show you that I love you and appreciate you."

She smiled finally.  "I already know that you love me and appreciate me," she said.  "And I'm usually happy to do what I can to make things easier around here, since I have more time right now.  But I'm certainly not going to argue with this."  She lifted the pendant of the necklace and looked down at it, then brought her eyes back up to mine.  "Or with any part of tonight, for that matter.  It was an awesome surprise, thank you."

"You're welcome," I said.  I stood and pulled her to her feet.  "Now, if you'd like to pick up where we left off, I won't stop you this time."

Caught Up?

On Friday, I had the following group text conversation:

Me:  Anyone want to do something tomorrow?

Lauren:  Can't, Alex booked us a last minute weekend trip.

Kinsley:  Evil Stepsister's graduation :(

Me:  Wait, what?  A trip? Like without telling you?

Kendra:  How is Alex still alive?  I'm free!

Kinsley:  Oooh, I'd rather go on a weekend trip.

Lauren: YES without telling me.  I hate him.

Me: Kendra, I'll call you later, we can plan something!

I had to step out at that point for a client, and after my client I had 57 new texts from that conversation, discussing Alex's surprise trip (does he know her at all?) and Damien's sister's graduation.  I got caught up while I ate my lunch and then got back to work.  

After work I called Kendra and we made plans to hang out the next day.  She was going to come out to our house and we were going to have a low-key day.  I was excited.  I've never really spent any one-on-one time with Kendra and it would be nice to do that.  I was also excited to not have to drive into town.  

Then I went to the gym.  I was actually kind of enjoying having some "me time" in the evenings so I could get back into my gym routine.  It had suffered greatly when I was spending so much of my free time with Brody.  Don't get me wrong, I'd love to have more evenings with him, but I wouldn't argue with a few evenings a week to do my own thing.  I never wanted to be one of those inseparable couples that did nothing without their other half.

I swung by the grocery store quickly on my way home (dead on a Friday night, good choice), then made myself some dinner.  I put the leftovers in the fridge for Brody to eat at some point, which I had been doing every time I cooked this week.  Half the time I didn't actually see him eat, but they always disappeared so I assumed he ate them and kept doing it.  

I was exhausted.  What is it about the first few days back to work after a vacation?  They always seem to take a lot out of you. I decided to spend some quality time in the bathtub with my Kindle.  I was still there 45 minutes later when Brody knocked on the door.  "Come in," I said.

"Hi," he greeted me.  He looked awful.  

I frowned.  "You look exhausted," I said, concerned.  

"I am," he confirmed.  "I also have a really terrible headache.  Too much staring at the computer screen, I guess.  I'm going to lay down for a little while, I think."

"Why don't you just go to bed?" I suggested.  He shrugged noncommittally and leaned down and kissed me before walking back out of the bathroom.  I laid in the tub for a couple more minutes before I got out and dried off.  I threw my robe on and walked out into the bedroom, where Brody was laying on the bed.  

I meant to go straight downstairs, but Brody stopped me, saying, "Come talk to me."  

I went over to the bed and nudged him until he rolled over onto his stomach.  I rubbed his neck, shoulders, and head while I told him about my day, and about Kendra coming over the next day.   He told me his new HR team was doing another round of interviews and that he'd turned down another new client today.  "I hate doing it," he said of turning down the client, "but I'd much rather provided the best service possible to fewer clients than provide shitty service so I can have more clients."

We chatted for a few more minutes, and then I could tell Brody was getting really sleepy, so I rubbed his neck in silence for a little while longer and then softly said I was going downstairs.  He nodded, his eyes closed, and I shut the light off as I left.  I cleaned up my dishes from making dinner as quietly as I could then flipped through the TV channels until I was tired enough for bed.

Brody was fast asleep when I got up there, and he didn't stir when I got into bed.  As soon as I was settled though, he rolled over onto his side and draped his arm across my back.  I'm pretty sure he wasn't even awake.  

Brody's phone rang early the next morning, and he stumbled out of bed to answer it.  He'd barely been home, and I'd forgotten that he was on call.  He got back into bed about 15 minutes later and we both fell back asleep.  When I woke up again, he was stretching next to me.  "Good morning," he said cheerfully. 

I rubbed my eyes and squinted at him.  "Morning," I replied.  "Is your head feeling better?"

"Much better," he answered.  "If you get up now, we can make breakfast together before I head in."  

"That's an amazing idea," I admitted, rolling onto my back and thinking about getting up.  

"I'm going to shower, so you have a few minutes."  I nodded and yawned, trying to wake up.  I don't understand people like Brody, who can go from asleep to fully awake and alert in just a couple minutes.  I feel like I need at least an hour, a shower, breakfast, and some caffeine to get there.  

"What time is Kendra coming?" he asked over his shoulder as he walked into the bathroom.

"1," I replied, fighting another yawn.  "We were going to grill some lunch and just hang out and catch up."

He nodded and swung the bathroom door closed.  I groped around on the nightstand until I had my phone in my hand.  It was 8:30 and Brody didn't seem like he was in too much of a hurry to get to work, which was nice.  I was up and had a pair of sweatpants and a fitted t-shirt on by the time Brody emerged from the bathroom in his towel.  I sat on the end of the bed and watched him rifle through his closet in search of clothes.  He turned his head and cocked an eyebrow at me.  "See something you like?" he asked, smirking.

"A couple things," I replied.  "I think that red shirt is a good choice for today, at least."  

He laughed and shook his head.  "And here I thought you were admiring me, not my wardrobe.  I guess I'll just get dressed and go on with my day."

"I mean, if there are other options that involve putting off getting dressed, I can definitely pretend to admire you," I teased him.  

He tossed his wet towel at me, and I wasn't quick enough to get out of the way.  By the time I got it off my head, he was in front of me, pulling me to my feet.  I ran my hands over his chest and down his stomach.  "Ah, now that your wardrobe isn't distracting me, I see lots of things I like."  He kissed me hard and didn't waste any time tugging my sweatpants down over my hips.  I've never been a big fan of "quickies" but since Brody was far more talented in bed than anyone else I've ever slept with, I have no complaints anymore.  I still prefer something a little less rushed, but an occasional quick romp can be fun too, especially when your partner can actually get you off.

So needless to say, 15 minutes later I was complaint-less and pulling some eggs out of the fridge.  We joked around as we made breakfast together and sat down to eat.  I knew Brody was eager to get to work and get things caught up, but he didn't rush through breakfast, which was nice.  When he was done, he shooed me out of the kitchen, did the dishes quickly, and took off.  I went upstairs and took a shower and got ready for Kendra to come over.

Kendra made it around quarter after 1, and we threw some pork chops and chicken breasts on the grill and then sat on the deck, drinking wine.  Day drinking is classy as long as it's wine.  Or...something like that.  "So how are you liking living here?" Kendra asked me.

"It's pretty great, for the most part," I said.  I told her about the library Brody had created for me.  "He's got an awesome tub, and I have my own huge walk-in closet.  So I can't complain about that!  I don't share closet space well, so having my own makes a big difference.  I struggle a little sometimes with being out of town now.  It was so easy to go grab something to eat or walk to Kinsley's house before, you know?  But I also realized that it doesn't take any longer to drive into town, depending on which part, from here than it does to drive across the city.  I think it just feels more isolated because it doesn't have that city bustle." I shrugged.

"I felt kind of similarly when I moved out of my downtown apartment to move in with Christian," she said.  "Even living in a purely residential neighborhood is a big change when you're used to walking out your front door and having everything you could ever need within a block or two."  

I had been a little nervous about spending so much time with Kendra since I really didn't know her well and was worried we wouldn't have much to talk about, but we were still sitting on the deck when Brody got home at close to 7.  

"Hey, baby," he greeted me, leaning down to kiss me.  "Hi, Kendra."

We both returned his greeting, and Kendra said, "I should probably get going, I didn't realize it was already almost 7."

"Don't leave because of me," Brody replied.  "I just came out to say hi, but I can get out of the way too."

"No, I need to get home anyway, but thanks," she answered.  "Thanks for feeding me, Liv!  I had fun."

I thanked her for driving out to see me and hanging out all day and walked inside with her.  We said goodbye and I ran into Brody in the kitchen on my way back out to the deck to cover the grill.  "I'm starving, what do you want to do for dinner?" 

I smiled.  "There's a pork chop and a chicken breast in the fridge, I grilled extras.  Otherwise there are some burgers we can throw on, if you'd rather eat your dinner freshly cooked for once."

He decided on burgers and went out to turn the grill back on while I got them out.  We made the burgers and sat on the deck to eat.  "What do you want to do tomorrow afternoon?" he asked.

"Hmmm, I guess I haven't thought about it yet.  Did you have anything in mind?"

"It's supposed to be really nice, I wouldn't mind getting out for a short hike," he replied.  I agreed.  "Somewhere around here, in case I get a call."  We tossed around a few trail ideas and agreed on one, then sat outside on the deck enjoying the sunshine until it got dark.  

Sunday morning Brody got up and disappeared into his office downstairs to work for a few hours before we went out hiking.  I crossed my fingers for no calls, and at noon we were still clear.  We ate a quick lunch of leftovers and headed out.  We got three hours of hiking in before Brody got a call that required us to head back.  I was pretty satisfied with that, and luckily it was something he could handle from home.  He took care of it in an hour and we spent the rest of the day relaxing and watching movies.  Brody had fallen asleep on the couch with his head in my lap by 9 pm.  I let him sleep there until I got up to go to bed.  

Lauren called me while I was at the gym on Monday.  I called her back and in lieu of a greeting she shrieked, "We said 'I love you' and I said it first and I don't even know who I am anymore!" 

"Hi," I said, blinking in surprise.  "What?"

She filled me in on their weekend trip and the events leading up to her accidental "I love you."   "Well," I said when she finished, "At least you don't have to worry about what to say back if he says it now."

"I guess not," she replied.

"What do you mean, 'you guess not'?"

"Well, I just mean that now he's probably going to expect me to say it, and it wouldn't make sense for me not to, so yeah, I guess I don't have to worry about what to say."

"You...sound like me," I said.

"I really do," she agreed.  "It's hard being you."  I burst into laughter.

When I had caught my breath, I asked, "You do love him though, right?" 

"Well, yeah," she replied.  "I mean, I think so.  I'm pretty sure.  I don't know what else I'd call it."

"Quick, someone tell my boyfriend that someone less romantic than me exists!" I said.  We talked for a few more minutes.  Once we hung up, I continued my recent weeknight routine.  Make dinner, eat, put leftovers in the fridge for Brody, shower, read until Brody got home.  It wasn't very exciting, and I was a little bored with it, even though I enjoyed my gym and reading time.  I just would have liked a little more time between Brody getting home and bedtime.  

The rest of the week was fairly similar to the week before.  Brody got home between 8 and 9 every night.  I worked on planning out details for the cookout he wanted to have that weekend.  He promised to help me shop and get things ready Saturday morning.

Thursday night, I was in bed reading by the time Brody got home.  "Guess what?" he said cheerfully as he came into the bedroom.

"What?" I asked flatly.  I was trying to be patient.  I was trying to be understanding.  I was also totally over working, being responsible for all the household stuff, and being Brody's event planner.  

"I'm pretty well caught up," he replied.  I could tell by his face that he had picked up on my lack of enthusiasm.  

"That's exciting," I replied, smiling this time. 

He smiled at my happier reaction.  "I'm sorry, these two weeks have sucked.  I probably won't be able to talk you into going on a week long vacation anywhere ever again after this.  I know you've been doing a lot around here, and it's decreased my stress a lot to know that I don't have to worry about feeding myself or cleaning or running out of clean clothes.  I know that doesn't make it suck any less for you, but thank you for everything that you've done."

"You're welcome," I said.  I looked down at my hands and then up at him.  "Next week won't be like this?"

"Next week shouldn't be like this," he confirmed.  "I'd like to be home in time to eat dinner with you next week.  And maybe even do the dishes after." 

"That's a plan I can get behind," I replied.  

Now to see if it happens.